Elton John is having a baby !!!!

I must confess that the news Elton John is going to become a father took me rather by surprise. The phone in shows were awash with callers giving their views on the subject. I was quite surprised how attitudes seem to have changed towards gay men adopting. Whilst there were callers who were rather upset, they were clearly a minority (assuming the stations put on a representative mix). I thought I'd chip in with my tuppence worth.

Lets have a look at some of the arguments against Elton. He's a sinner seems to be the recurrent theme. Sadly there is no restriction on sinners having children. In fact if sinners were banned from having kids, we'd have died out long ago. Then there's the fact that his wife is a bloke (or he's another blokes wife?). Well it isn't a living arrangement it would suit me, but then there are quite a few living arrangements that wouldn't suit me. The question is, will it suit the baby? Unlike many of the babies born on Xmas day, I doubt that Baby John will want for anything. Elton is noted for his "extravagent lifestyle". Then again quite a few people I know do all sorts of things when the kids are tucked up in bed. If Elton was still strung out permanently on cocaine, I'd say that would be an issue, but he isn't. He's grown up.

One caller to a show said that he wouldn't be exposed to the things "normal dads would do with their kids". Well nope, he probably won't. As his Dad is the lifelong chairman of Watford FC, he'll probably think that everyone sits in the directors box at football matches and that everyone can have a kickabout with the first team. I suppose he'll be forced to watch all those terrible shows, such as Billy Elliott which Elton helped put together. His old man might even teach him to play a bit of piano. Perhaps (horror of horrors) his upbringing will make him grow up to be a homosexual. That seems to be the fear of most callers. Strangely enough, all of the homosexuals I know were raised in rampantly heterosexual environments, being brainwashed from the day they were born. No amount of social pressure made them see the light and my guess is that Junior John will be whatever he's going to be. What I can never quite get my head around is the view which the most rabid callers have, that homosexuality is so marvellous that one whiff and you are converted for life.  I suspect that reflects what lies behind the door of their own closet.

I suspect that Junior John will have a pretty cossetted lifestyle, he'll have nannies galore and get the bets tickets for all of the best show and best football games. I suspect his Dads will be pretty relaxed about whatever lifestyle choices he makes. I suspect that in 20 years, he'll become a successful musician.

To be honest I worry more about the effect it will have on Elton. He's in his sixties. Junior John will be a teenager as Elton is in his late 70's and early 80's. It's bad enough dealing with stroppy kids when you are in your forties. I rather hope they have a brother or sister pretty soon, for the sake of the baby. It would do him some good to have a peer to play with.

So if you want to know whether I think it's a good thing that the Johns are having a baby? Well I always think that news of a baby is a joyous event. If I was a perfect parent, I'd feel entitled to criticise everyone else, but I'm not. It may interest you to know that when the missus was preggers with my eldest, Tanya Byron, who hosted "The House of Tiny Tearaways" was in our NCT group. Her eldest is the same age as mine. As I sat sniggering through some of her shows, I reflected on one thing. I believe that most people are massively ill prepared for parenthood. We were exceptionally lucky in that both my mum and my missus mum were local and gave all the support and help they could. Whether it was my mum sending a tray of dinner down or her mum watching the kids to give us a break, we were blessed. I'd urge the Johns to learn as much as they can about parenting and enjoy as much time as they can with their kids.

My wife and my children really are the best thing in my life. I wouldn't wish anyone to have a sad and lonely old age and that's why I really hope it works out for the John family. Good luck to them, and for all of the Bible bashers going off on one, remember what Jesus advised "don't point out the splinter in your brothers eye, when you have a plank in your own".