Time to face up to the reality of rape

It seems that rape is a rather hot topic at the moment. Page 12 of the Daily Express today has a large story under the banner "Why did police turn a blind eye to this gang of rapists". Being the Daily Express, it seems to be under the impression that rapists exclusivey come from Pakistan. It seems that the Express can only find imbeciles who have lived in a hole and have no knowledge of geography to write columns for them. The author Chris Roycroft-Davis bizarrely states "Notice that I said “Pakistani” and not “Asian”, the euphemism beloved of those in the race industry and the broadcast media who believe that facts can somehow be racist and therefore must be suppressed. To label them Asian insults Indians, Chinese, Japanese, Singaporeans, indeed all citizens east of Istanbul." Sadly this rather silly man doesn't realise that Pakistan is a thousand or so miles East of Istanbul, which is at the Western most point of Asia in Turkey. Sadly the concept that Pakistanis are the only men who form gangs and rape women is a sad myth. It is a matter of fact that over three million women were raped in Berlin when it fell to the USSR in 1945.

Earlier this month, the Daily Mail reported details of a meeting set up by a "seedy pro rape campaigner" called Roosh V. The Guardian reported how this individual actually turned out to be a rather sad and pathetic individual who still lives with his mum. He had planned to hold a series of meetings to promote his rather sad agenda that women are there simply for the sexual gratification of men.

There are three reasons why I find such views abhorrant. The first is that like every other human on the planet, I was born to a mother. The logical extension of Mr Roosh's view is that my mother was fair game for any man who so fancied it. When my mother was 80 years old, and was recovering from a stroke, she got to the point where she could walk down the road and buy a paper. She was proud of herself, having fought back from being totally paralysed. This all came to an abupt end when a drunk attempted to molest her in the shop. It was only the kind intervention of the pakistani shop owner that prevented a far more serious incident occurring. Sadly it made my mother feel vulnerable and she would not go out on her own after the incident. How could I find such behaviour anything other than sickening. Had I witnessed the assault, I would probably be in prison right now, as I can honestly say that I would have reacted in a way that would have seen no end to my wrath. I am not proud of that, but to this day I feel angry about the incident.

The second reason I find this sickening is that a former girlfriend of mine was raped in Stockholm by a stranger in 1980. She was an extremely attractive lady and the effects on her were devastating. I didn't know her before the incident, but her friends explained to me quietly just how devastating it was. She explained to me the sheer brutality of a stranger grabbing her, dragging her to a quite spot, violentlyripping her clothes off and violating her, then walking away with a sneer. It was sickening. I know some people may find it titilating but for me it was horrific. After she told me, she broke down in tears and asked what I thought? I said it was horrible. She was worried I'd find her less attractive. I told her I just saw her as a totally innocent victim and it wasn't her fault. It just put into sharp focus just what a vile crime it was and what horrible men commit such a crime.

The third reason is that I have daughters, who I dearly love. I don't want men to see them as fair game. I want them to find partners who love and cherish them and appreciate their beauty. As far as I am concerned, being a real man means having a family and responsibilities. This family means mothers, wives, daughters, sisters, cousins and friends. To me anyone who denies any of these the basic human right to say no to an invasion of their body is a repulsive bully.

The truth is that rape has nothing to do with sex. It is about power and domination. Sex is a beautiful thing. It is at its very best when two people want to share a beautiful moment and make each other as happy as they possibly can. A sexual act where one person has no regard for the other can never be a fullfilling and satisfying experience. It is simply a desperate act of a sexually repressed and immature being, who is so emotionally stunted that they cannot interest a woman enough to consent to share something good. It is clear that they are unable to achieve a staisfactory relationship wihhout use of force. How can such individuals be seen as anything other than vile and disgusting, full of emotional insecurity. As a society, we need to wake up to the fact that we have far too many such individuals in our midst. We need to start educating men at a young age that such behaviour isnot only unacceptable, but a sign of a weak and pathetic person.

To simply blame Roosh V. or men from Pakistan is a simplistic and stupid action. The problem is far deeper and far more serious.