I was having a bit of a laugh with a few of my studio customers recently. A well known band, who I won't name nipped in for a mid tour, last minute rehearsal. They had a few days off and wanted to sort a few things out in the set, as they'd not been happy with a couple of songs on the first week of the tour. This happens occasionally. You rehearse the set and then for some reason, a couple of songs just don't seem to work in the context of the set. That's not what this blog is about though. It was the fact that a band turned up, the night after a gig, for a rehearsal at 11am (actually they were earlier). Not only that, they looked bright eyed and bushy tailed. One of them came in and looked at our extensive display of crisps, pot noodles and choclate bars and laughed. They said "Don't you have anything healthy for breakfast, I'm starving!". I explained that these days most bands get a deliveroo (other services are available). As they mulled over whether to have granola and fresh orange juice, or a bagel and a capuccino, I laughed and said "What is Rock and Roll coming too, when did we all stop having a bottle of JD for breeakfast". We had a snigger. They told me about the catering for the tour. One of the band is lactose intolerant, another is gluten free, two are non drinkers and one is a vegan.
On my own journey, I do recall the days we started gigging. Our first few gigs were self organised. The first False Dots gig where we got a rider was The Midland Arms, in 1982. We got a free bar tab. It was wonderful. We didn't abuse it and it was great to feel appreciated. Later in the year, we played at The Kenton Jewish Youth club. When we arrived, a nice lady asked us what food we wanted. I asked what was on offer and she said "Anything you like, so long as it's Kosher". Mark, our drummer, who was Jewish opted for Chicken and chips. Craig and Paul followed suit. I asked if she had any smoked salmon, and ended up with a couple of smoked salmon and cream cheese bagels and chips. It was delicious. When we finished, the same lady made me a salt beef bagel to keep me going. I learned at school to get in with the dinner ladies, and it has always paid off. I told her "That was delicious, do you run a restaurant", she replied "Oh no, I just have five hungry sons!". I said Five kid, you don't look old enough, they are lucky to have a mum who is such a good cook". When we played there a month later, she gave me a bag of home made treats to take home, which were delicious. I'd adivse all up and coming bands to remember this. It is the best life lesson.
My mate Bob The Scouser is a Michelin starred chef and was poached from the restaurant he worked at to do film catering. He ended up catering for Bond movies when Pierce Brosnan was James Bond. He told me how Brosnan always made time for him and would chat to him. Bob used to insist on the finest bacon and sausages, Brosnan was so impressed that he got Bob to source a supply of them for his personal use. The nature of film shoots meant that Bob would get ten minutes notice and have to make 100 bacon sandwiches, when a take had been completed. He explained that real secret of being a successful set chef was to make sure that the Superstar never missed his bacon roll because the cameraman had six of them. I asked how did you manage that. Bob explained that it was simple, you didn't rest until the star had eaten and was happy. He also made sure he had the right condements.
I knew another chef who did catering for bands and film. He said that bands were far easier, as the timings were easier and more predictable. It only went wrong when management hadn't done their homework. He did catering for one US soul Diva. She had very particular requirements and would send food back if the potatoes weren't cut symmetrically or there was any fat on the meat. One day, he was preparing the pre show buffet and she just turned up in the kitchen, unannounced. This lady, who was a notoriously difficult diva said "Do you mind if I make myself a sandwich?". He replied "I'll do that if you want, that's what you pay me for". She replied "It's OK, Really want to make my own". As she was the boss, he said OK but was rather worried. What would the catering manager say, if he found out. She went and helped herself, She made a huge sandwich, then asked him if he wanted one and proceeded to make him one. They then proceded to sit in the kitchen and scoff them and have a chat. The catering manager came in and froze. She explained that she really liked making her own sandwiches, as it was hard to explain what she really wanted. The next day, he sent one up for her, exactly as she'd made it and she took the time to come down and thank him. After that, nothing was sent back and he got a bonus. The catering manager told my friend that he was horrified when he'd seen her in the kitchen, but it had completely changed the whole vibe of the tour for the catering crew.
It was an old joke, what do Rock Stars eat for breakfast? They don't, because they don't get up til lunchtime, may have been true for 1970's rock bands. These days, many will be in the gym or eating granola bars and drinking orange juice at the crack of dawn. Times change!
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