The Sunday Reflection #99 - Why I think the Nuns at St Vincents School were wrong!

 I went to St Vincents Roman Catholic Priary School in Mill Hill from the age of 4 until I was 11. The school was run by the Daughters of Charity, or "the Nuns" as we knew them. Imagine my surprise to learn late in life that The Daughters of Charity are technically not Nuns at all. Orders of Nuns make a life long commitment to Jesus, whereas the Daughters renew their vows every year, so they are technically not nuns at all. I wish I'd known at the time, but it'd probably just got me clobbered with "the bat" by Gabsie (AKA Sister Gabriel, the headmistress).

My memories of the Nuns were mostly rather negative. When we were naughty, we were invited to stand on the stage during morning assembly. We had to stand with our hands on our heads, which is rather painful after a few minutes. I recall at the start of one term, I guess I was about 8 or 9, we were called into assembly. Gabsie made an announcement that has haunted me to this day. She said "I attended a conference of Catholic Nuns who are teachers in the holiday. We have been informed that we are no longer going to make naughty children stand on the stage with their hands on their heads". We all cheered excitedly. This was great news. She then announced "In future, all naughty children will stand with their hands up in the air, as this is far more painful". It was. At the time, it seemed perfectly normal, but can you imagine a conference of Nuns debating the best way to torture naughty children?

The Nuns would say some very strange things to us. One of the things that I recall, although not the context or how it came up. She said "You must love Jesus with all your heart, before anything. You must love Jesus so much that if a soldier put  a gun to your childs head and told you to renounce Jesus, you would say no, even if it meant your baby got shot, if you don't you won't go to heaven". This really troubled me. I doubted that I could do that. That made me feel like I was a very bad person. Now I am an adult and I have children, I know exactly what I would do in that situation. The thing is that whilst it troubled me at the time, it does not now. Not because I don't want to go to heaven anymore, I rather like the idea. The reason is that I do not believe that such a renunciation made under duress would count for anything. I happen to believe that as a parent you have to put your children first. There is a biblical text where the Lord asks the Prophet Abraham to murder his child. Abraham complies and is just about to perform the deed, when God relents and the child is spared. It is one of many texts in the Old Testament that I find difficult. I simply can't believe that a compassionate God as I understand, would put anyone through such mental anguish. Such things are why I could never become a priest (well that and celibacy). 

However, I also recognise that some the text such as this are more symbolic than factual. Should God exist in the form which is described in the Bible, then I think it is fair to say that He is beyond our comprehension. The Bible describes Satan as the Father of Liars. Clearly if Satan exists, then he is also beyond our comprehension. Then there is the issue of mental illness. I have a little voice in the back of my head (for want of a better description) that tells me I should help Old Ladies to cross the road and do other things that are good. I try and listen to it. But what if that little voice, that I always was lead by the Nuns to believe was my Guardian Angel, started telling me to kill people or blow things up in the name of the Lord? How could I know whether it really was Gods will, or whether Satan had booted out my Guardian Angel and was whispering devilment, or more likely, I was just suffering a psychotic episode?  I am always highly nervous of people who's actions are 'guided by Gods will'. 

I treat that little voice as an advisor. But the decisions are mine and if a voice tells me to do things that are wrong, bad or evil, I would simply ignore them. When George Bush said the Lord had told him to bomb Iraq, I felt deeply uneasy. I would actually feel more comfortable if I thought Bush was lying if he said that. If he really believed that God told him to do that, I have to ask whether his 'little voice' has been hijacked or whether he was mentally ill. Of course, compared to the current encumbant in the White House, Bush seems like a paragon of virtue. Does Donald Trump have a 'little voice' in his head guiding him? 

I was four when the Nuns started 'guideing and shaping me'. I am sixty four now. Rightly or wrongly, they made me what I am. The morality and values I have were drummed into me by them. Some of it, I have rejected. I've come to realise that torturing naughty children is a bad thing. I've also realised that decisions taken under duress are not things you should be judged on. I've realised that texts as found in the Bible are not without their problems, but you have to view them in a rational way. The Ten commandments say "Thou shalt not kill", which is a fairly unequivocable statement and I think that settles the arguement. 

For many years I felt a lingering anger and resentment towards the Nuns who ran the school. I felt that they had not really had the wellbeing of the children in their charge at heart. Times were different and things like corporal punishment were accepted by society as the norm in schools to maintain discipline. We were brainwashed into thinking that without it, schools would descend into anarchy. The fact is that they were wrong. There are many problems with our schools in the UK, but these are caused by lack of funds, not lack of clobbering. The thing I find it hardest to forgive them for, though, was the fact that they convinced me I was a terrible person, because I would spare my own child in an impossible situation. Of all the things they were wrong about, that is the one they were most wrong about.

You may wonder what got me thinking about this. Well, as I do most Sundays, I was at mass this morning. During the Gospel, Jesus tells the Religious elders that "Prostitutes and tax collectors will enter Heaven before they do". He was berating them for paying lip service to faith, but not actually living the morality they preach. It made me think of the Nuns. They wore robes, so we all knew they had a religious calling, but they'd make seven year old kids stand on a stage for fifteen minutes with their arms in the air and tell us we were going to hell because we might publicly renounce our faith if given an impossible choice.

I will finish this with one final piece of advice. Should you be a devout Catholic and find yourself in the situation the Nuns described, spare the child and then go to confession at the first possible opportunity. I am sure that Jesus would forgive you, even if the Nuns wouldn't!

The Saturday List #510 - Six years on, ten ways that Covid has changed me

 Seven years ago to the day, I wrote a Saturday List detailing ten drinks that were so 1970's. The country wasn't fully open from lockdown. Vaccination had not started, and although there was "eat out to help out" life wasn't normal. Like many small businesses, I was sitting on the edge of a precipice, surviving on government hand outs for my business. We were actually open, but with very stringent controls in place.

I genuinely didn't know if my business or the country would ever truly recover from the mess. Boris Johnson was PM and had yet to be be discredited and fall from grace. Rishi Sunak was seen as a brilliant chancellor. Nigel Farage had seemingly disappeared up his own jacksie as the European Withdrawal Bill had passed. Football matches were played with no fans present and taped crowd noise. I genuinely wondered if I'd ever go to see another band, and whether there was any future for The False Dots as a live band. 

Yet here we are. I was musing on how life has changed, for me, the changes have been massive. Although I've never tested positive for covid, I believe I had it before it was recognised. I had all the symptoms and thought I had lung cancer. I only twigged when it was announced that loss of sense of taste was a key symptom. I'd been for a curry at new year 2020 with mates. They were all saying it was lovely. I thought it tasted of nothing. 

So I thought I'd list the ways life has changed

1. My sense of smell. I now have the sense of smell of a bloodhound. This is a terrible superpower to have. The good bits? When Oak trees etc shed pollen, I can smell it. It is like an overpowering fragrance. The bad side? People smell awful. When people have bad personal hygene, it makes me retch in a way that I never noticed before. Worst of all, I hate the way I smell! I will give you an example. I was at Echo & The Bunnymen on Tuesday night and the woman in front of me in the drinks queue stank to high heaven of body odour. I had to leave a huge gap to avoid throwing up. No one else seemed to notice. She was with a friend who was whispering in her ear. Odd. 

2. I know Mill Hill better than ever. During lockdown, we did massive walks with our dogs every day. I now know all of the country routes across the Totteridge Valley in a way I never did before. It is amazing.

3. So many of my mates are very gullible. I have become increasingly horrified at how easily taken in so many of my mates are. Being locked up with no social interaction for a year sent many down rabbit holes. AI has turned many into deranged commentators. It is sad to say that I actually avoid a couple of good mates now, because they talk complete rubbish. I am not perfect, but I try and see both sides and take an objective view to information. Many of my mates simply do not want to listen to anything that contradicts their views.

4. My music tastes have changed. I listened to a hell of a lot of music in the period. Whereas I am still absolutely in love with Ska and Punk rock, I listen to a lot more soul and funk than I had previously. I have also almost completely gone off heavy rock, which I didn't mind so much.

5. I have started taking singing seriously and love it. I have been in a band for 47 years, I did a bit of singing, if you can call it that, in the first couple of years, but didn't take it seriously and was delighted to get a singer in the band. Covid saw our then singer, Allen Ashley, unable to join us, so I took up he reigns. I now love it. I am getting a lot better at it as well. The False Dots have a gig in Friday the 16th of October at Nambucca in Archway, it's free so why not come along!

I must say that lockdown made me reflect very seriously on life and I realised that my approach to making music post the 1990 pause in the bands career had gone wrong. I realised that I had to write what I wanted to write, not just write to satisfy what I perceived other people to want. It has worked.

6. My view of Religion has changed. To me, there are two different things that set many people's morality. One is called faith and the other is called religion. I was brought up as a Roman Catholic and if I am totally honest, it has been 90% a hugely positive influence on me. Religion gives a fraework for faith to operate in. However, I realised that faith is the important part. Faith, not religion sees you through. Faith is the voice in your head that tells you what is right and what is wrong. I have realised that some aspects of religion are wrong, but faith never is. I am not articulate enough to spell this out in four sentences. 

7. I have realised I still have dreams. The pause in my life made me look at what I was doing. I wanted to make music. I wanted to scratch a few itches that have been bugging me. One day I will....

8. I appreciate the people I love more. I am a pretty selfish person in many ways. That is not always a bad thing, as we live our lives for ourselves, not for everyone else. But I try and be more thoughtful.

9. I realised that very few organisations are well run. One of the reasons that I am not a conspiracy theorist is because I have come to the conclusion that human beings cannot operate any sort of organisation beyond the size of a  5 a side football team, whithout getting bogged down in stupidity, personality clashes, ego's etc. If you look at the UK state. I would estimate that at least 25% of the entire budget of the government is wasted on things that are entirely useless and stupid. However, because they appeal to the certain politicians and the people who vote for them, they are sacred cows. I worked for some of the worlds biggest companies in my IT career. The longer I worked there, the more I realised that the companies were stacked full of middle managers, who contributed nothing but were masters of self preservation and self promotion. There is always someone to stab you in the back when you are doing a good job.

10. The world keeps turning and humanity is actually very insignificant in the bigger scheme of things. Life is a funny old thing. During the early days of lockdown, the weather was beautiful and I spent most of the time on a sun lounger, drinking beer, looking at the sky. It sapped me of all creative energy. For the first time in my life I was happy to do nothing. There were no planes flying, the M1 motorway was silent. I was just staring into infinity, and it started staring back at me. Day would turn to night, the Sun would set, The Moon would rise, the stars would flicker. The same stars that my ancestors saw 10,000 years ago. The same constellations. Somewhere, on a planet orbiting one of those stars, maybe someone just like me was sitting on a lounger, looking up at me. But we'll never ever know each other, even though we might get on like a house on fire.  We are all incredibly small. A mate said to me, in a moment of reflection "Do you think anyone will remember you in a hundred years time?". I'm guessing by then, no one will be alive who knew me. Will any of this blog persist? Will my music? Probably not. My Mum was born in 1926, I still remember her but she died in 2008 and in 2108, she will just be a name on a record site. This may seem disturbing, but it is liberating. I realised that I was living my life for me, in the present. I want to leave a legacy for my children, I want my friends to recall me fondly and be glad they knew my, when they attend my funeral. But it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. My mission in life is to try and make people happy. If I succeed that, even for a fleeting moment, it is all worthwhile. 

Barnet Council apponts Grenfell Director to run housing for council - Please come to this lobby to express your disgust at this decision

A MASS LOBBY OF BARNET COUNCILis being organised in response to the recent news that Barnet Council has made permanent the appointment of Laura Johnson to a senior housing role at The Barnet Group. Laura Johnson. Johnson was the Director of Housing at Kensington and Chelsea council at the time of the Grenfell disaster. According to a report in the Guardian "The Grenfell inquiry found that, in her previous role, Johnson pushed for a new contractor to carry out the tower’s renovation works on a lower budget, which ultimately meant metal cladding was swapped for combustible plastic-filled panels to save money.".  Tbe Barnet Eye and many local residents think that this is a shameful decision. There is an ongoing inquiry into the tragedy. How can the Barnet Labour administration possibly justify the appointment of someone who failed so catastrophically in a  previous role to a senior role in the organisation that runs housing in Barnet. I have documented many terrible decisions on this blog since its inception in 2008, but appointing someone so closely associated with the death of 70 people, in a tragedy that was completely avoidable and caused by shoddy work and cost cutting, authorised at the highest level in the council, must be the most crass of all. Please support for Barnet housing tenants Outside Hendon Town Hall

📅 Tuesday 20 October

🕕 6pm

📢 Bring banners, placards and your voice

👥 All welcome

Residents, community activists and organisations are being asked to add their names to our solidarity statement.

We want to show that there is strong support for Grenfell bereaved families, survivors and residents, and that their voices must continue to be heard and treated with respect.

Please take a minute to read the statement and, if you support it, add your name and share the link with others.

👉 https://forms.gle/1TStirm7mBFAZYds6

Every name helps demonstrate the strength of solidarity.

✊ Please sign and share.

Rock and Roll Stories #77 - Five great bands for £3!

 Over 46 years ago, I went to this gig >>>>>

Can you guess which band I went to see? I will retirn to that in a minute. Not bad value for £3 was it?  I asked AI how much £3 in 1980 is worth at todays prices? The answer - £3 in 1980 is worth about £16.70 today due to cumulative inflation - That is only slightly more than you'd pay to see The False Dots at the Dublin Castle today and you got five bands! 

To give some context, Echo and the Bunnymen hadn't had any hits, but had been on the John Peel show and were being touted as the next big thing, as were Psychedelic Furs and The Teardrop Explodes. All had had singles, which hadn't really bothered the charts, but all were being heavily touted by the NME. As the billing indicates, A Certain Ratio were slightly less well known. The band I went to see were Manicured Noise, an obscure Manchester Band that I'd started following. I was delighted with this line up as I was curious about all of the bands (rightly so it would seem). 

I was 17 at the time. I'd probably already seen 200 bands at this point, as I'd try and go to a couple of gigs a week if I could. We were really spoiled for choice. Many of the line ups had three or four amazing bands. The first punk gig I went to was The Ramones, Talking Heads and The Saints in 1977, That was £2. It was never an easy choice. Every weekend, it seemed there'd be 2-3 gigs featuring bands I'd like to see. 

On the night of The Lyceu gig, I could've gone to the Marq uee in London to see Robert Smith of the Cure with a side project called "The Cult Hero". If I'd gone to DIngwalls, it would've been Eddie and The Hot Rods and The Members. Stiff Little Fingers were playing at the Hammersmith Odeon. Most of my Orange Hill mates went to The Torrington to see 9 Below Zero. My mates who were into Reggae were at the Venue for the legendary Prince Far I and Creation Rebel (who use my studios).  

There is a brilliant resource thatt has all of the copies of NME digitised, which is where I got the listing on the left  - Check it out archive.org/search?query=creator%3A%22NME+-+New+Musical+Express%22&page=2&sort=-addeddate&and%5B%5D=year%3A%221980%22 

For me, this is fascinating. There are so many gigs that totally fascinate me. The listings and the ads are a treasure trove. You may wonder what sparked this off? Last night I went to see Echo and The Bunnymeny at Regents park Theatre. It reminded me of the first time I saw them and prompted the deep dive. At the time, my band, The False Dots hadn't even done a gig. It was bands like this that gave us inspiration, watching the rise and grow. 

Just over a year later, The False Dots name appeared in the Gig listings of the NME for the very first time. We thought we'd hit the big time. See if you can spot us (A clue - look for London Hendon). To me, at the time, The NME seemed like the Bible. It is bizarre for me to find that The False Dots outlived the printed copy of the NME although there is still a website. 

I spent my last years at school with my head buried in the music papers. Within about five years, there was nothing in it I was interested in. That is how the music industry moves. It is aimed at 13-21 year olds, there is a constant churn of fashions, trends and fads. The NME was the bible for teenagers with pretentions of bing hip and cool. The key element though was that one day you were the king of the castle and a year later no one wanted to know, or at least that was the view of the industry.

However, the bands that stuck with it, or came back and reformed found that the audience was still there. That is why I was at the gig last night. Today, a mate said to me "Why aren't young people interested in live music and bands in the way we were?". There are many reasons, but I think the main one is that when I got into music I was 14 and I could go to gigs, drink beer and watch bands without being asked for ID. I went with all my mates. I was out with Boz Boorer, of the Polecats and Morrissey fame last week. He told me how he won £1.37 playing poker in the 6th form common room at Orange Hill and spent it going to see a band. It covered his bus fare and entrance. He couldn't afford a drink. He was 16, went on his own and got home at midnight. His parents didn't bat an eyelid. The youth of today simply wouldn't be let in. The first gig I went to on my own with my school mates, was when I was 15. A bunch of us went to The Roundhouse from FCHS to see Eddie and The Hot Rods at Xmas 1977 at The Roundhouse. I'd been to a few with my sister who at 19 was an adult, but we were all 15-16. It was £2, paid for from my paper round and cleaning cars for my Dad. The idea of going to a gig and not being let in because I was too young never occurred to me. The sad truth is that it wouldn't happen today. By the time I was 17 and I went to see the Lyceum gig, I was an old hand. It was a lifetime habit. But then again, financially it was also affordable for me. I had a job that was my own money and you could see five classic bands for £3, what was not to like. 

We have become a society that is so obsessed with protecting everyone from everything, that no one has a chance to actually live. I said this to a friend recently who said "You can't honestly say that you'd have let your 14 year old go to see a punk band on the bus". They sort of missed the point. When we went, a gang of us would go and there was safety in numbers. There were scrapes, but I soon learned to spot danger and we all looked out for each other. I think it was the best thing in my life and I wouldn't deprive anyone of that, but I would want my kids going out with a gang, as we did.

Anyway, as I said, to this day the habit continues. This was last nights fun. I suppose one day I'll be too old for all of this.

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A post shared by Roger Tichborne (@rogtex)

I hope that day is a long way off.

What should bands expect from a music venue promoter

 Having run a studio and played in a band for 47 years, as well as running several music festival over the years, and promoting our own gigs, I thought it might be good to pass on some of the things I've learned over the years on the subject of gig promoters. This post is primarily aimed at relatively inexperienced bands playing original material, looking to build a profile. 

The first thing to consider is "why do we want to do a gig".  This may sound like a silly question, but there are many reasons a band may want to do gigs and you should consider what you are trying to achieve before you leap headlong into the world of gigging. If you've never gigged before, it really is a good idea, if you can, to do a couple of low profile gigs to try out material and see how the band gels, before you launch out on the wonderful world of gigging.  My band, The False Dots,  started gigging in 1980. We were still at school. Our first two gigs were self promoted shows in the local church hall, the third was at our school. The wisdom of this became apparent when our lead singer didn't show up for the first gig. Just imagine if we'd been playing for a good promoter. Our fourth gig was supporting a band called Way of The West, who had a Radio 1 single of the week! It meant we were used to playing live and were able to do ourselves justice. I really think it is important to know the band works before engaging with professional promoters. We also played a couple of parties for mates, that we didn't consider 'proper gigs' at the time, but actually enabled us to build a following.

When you feel you are ready to start stepping up, there are three things to consider. The first is whether the promoter is right for you. Often, the best promoters specialise in a specific genre of music and work to put on a bill where bands complement each other. If you play Metal, then look for someone who promotes Metal, if you play Reggae, look for a Reggae promoter, etc. They will understand that you are a new band, and should be sympathetic. Some venues use different promoters on different nights, so it is important to ensure that you get the right one. I would always advise going to the venue and checking out the setup, when you are starting out. Speak to the bands, the door people, the sound person if you can. See if the venue has posters up. Check the socials to see what effort the promoter has gone to. If the promoter has done nothing, then they will most likely do nothing for you. 

Promoters will ask you how many people you will bring. They will also expect you to bring them. This is not them being arsey, they are running it as a business. If you bring no one, then they won't rebook you, unless there is a very good reason (tube strikes etc). If you can persuade your fans to buy advance tickets, this makes a good impression, but don't be bullied by promoters demanding pre-sales. If the promoter has a "cancellation clause", where they can pull the gig and not refund your fans their ticket, then do not take the gig under any circumstances. They should confirm the timings well in advance.

Often bands pull a far bigger crowd for their first couple of proper gigs. Mates will come a couple of times, but to grow your fan base, you need a lot of hard work. Make sure you tag the promoter into your socials. If they do not repost your socials, then they are not doing what they should. If you post 100 times a day, then they won't but they should post some of your postings. Also tag in the other bands on the bill. Make your postings appealing to fans of all on the bill. That way, you may get a few fans of the headliners coming early. The promoters should support this activity.

With regards to money, the promoter should be clear and transparent as to what you will receive. This is usually a share of the door, often for people who sign in for you. Promoters have to cover their costs first, so it is not unusual for a minimum door take to be required before you are paid.

To sum up. A good promoter will

* Make all terms and conditions of performance clear up front.

* Put effort into making the line up work for all bands.

* Put effort into getting fans along via posters/leaflets/socials

* Pay you as agreed

* Communicate properly

A bad promoter will

* Mess you around on timings.

* Threaten to cancel the gig if you don't sell advance tickets.

* Make no effort to make line ups work.

* Not be interested in your actual music.

* Hassle you on the phone and change arrangements at short notice with no reason.

The False Dots have mostly played for good promoters, who support us and are reasonable. The bad ones we've played for have been a nightmare. We have fulfilled the gigs, as I consider it unprofessional to cancel them, but we have told them to jog on, when approached again. It is also worth saying that we've done gigs for good promoters that didn't work out. This was usually because the venues were at places we couldn't pull a crowd (notably one at the Tunnel Club in Greenwich on a Tuesday night, where two people came).  You lean from such things. They waste everyones time. Now we tend to play in Camden, Islington and around Barnet as we can pull a crowd and do festivals etc, where there is an audience that we can reach. Make sure that wherever you play, it fits into a plan to grow the band.

And lastly good luck. The False Dots are part of the Band Up network of Independent bands. This was us performing at Fabwick in Hackney. Check it out as it is the best resource for new unsigned bands looking for gigs etc.

ADHD does exist and it is a treatable medical condition

 When I started this blog, one of the absolute first principles I vowed to abide by was that I would not stand by and say nothing when I saw people spreading dangerous untruths, either through ignorance or malice. I have come to realise that with the rise of X.com and the Elon Musk era, where people get verified and rewarded for clicks, ignorance is far more dangerous than malice, as ignorance is harder to rebut and refute. People who spout ignorance are generally far harded to argue with. However if we stand by and say nothing, then their uninformed views become accepted and entrenched.

So what sparked this. Yesterday, this tweet popped onto my timeline.

ADHD is NOT over diagnosed, how can it be - it doesn’t exist. pic.twitter.com/LeefGyHpYZ

— Nick Buckley MBE (@NickBuckleyMBE) September 20, 2026

I don't follow this character and I'd not previously heard of him, but as he has an MBE and over 80,000 followers, I felt that some people may feel his tweet was an informed and intelligent view and that ADHD does not exist. He is totally incorrect. How do I know? My nephew who is now in his 40's has ADHD. He was born and raised in Florida. His father, now retired was one of the USA's most acclaimed ER doctors. During Tim's long career (he's 80 now) he told me he probably saved 10,000 lives. He was an executive for the corporation that had the contract for  hospital services to the US Congress. Of all the people I know, Tim's expertise on medicine I would trust more than anyone on the planet. In short, he is a pre-eminent expert in the field of medicine, and as an ER doctor, working mainly in Miami, saw more different medical situations than almost anyone on the planet.

My nephew was chronically under performing at school. He was diagnosed with ADHD, by one of the pre-eminent pediatric consultants in the USA. My brother in law, theough his business connections, had access to the best medical practitioners in the USA, which has the most advanced medical system in the world. My nephew was prescribed with Ritalin. His grades improved and he eventually graduated with a degree in architecture. 

So when I read Mr Buckley's tweet, I asked myself several questions. Firstly does he have a better knowledge of medicine than my brother in law, or his colleague who provided the diagnosis? I will donate £100 to the charity of his choice if he can prove he is, however from his profile there is no evidence at all. Secondly, does he believe that a man like my brother in law, who spent his life saving people's lives, would allow his own son to be prescribed a dangerous sunbstance, for no reason at all? Well maybe Nick Buckley thinks that, but to me the proposition is ridiculous. Which brings me to the third question. Is Nick Buckley being malign or simply ignorant by posting such a statement?

I have no idea at all. I am guessing that he has no experience of the condition.  The article he commented on was that the Daily Mail stated that there was an over diagnosis. I am more than prepared to accept this. However when someone who has simply got an uninformed opinion on such a matter posts such a tweet, it cannot go unchallenged. I am sure I have many views that are incorrect, ill informed, stupid, etc. I am more than happy to listen to people who know what they are talking about and issue corrections when I am wrong.

Sadly, we live in a society where people get financially incentivised to post such things. The bottom line is people read such things, see his MBE and assume that he knows what he's talking about. When they then encounter someone with ADHD, they will mistakenly believe that they do not have a medically recognised condition.  This can lead to bullying and discrimination etc. I don't understand why any decent person would post something like this. Do you?

Oh yeah, two other things. Firstly, in my family, I think that the person I am most proud of, who is still alive is my brother in law Tim. Imagine having 10,000 people being alive because you were good at your job. And I am proud of my nephew, who through bloody hard work and being lucky enough to have intelligent parents who wanted the best for him got a fantastic degree. That should tell you all you need to know. 

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The Sunday Reflection #98 - A different kind of Sunday

 I have a pretty set Sunday ritual, but that all went out of the window today. My daughter & her boyfriend bought me a pair of tickets for Man City vs Sunderland at the Etihad stadium for today. Rather annoyingly, when I went to book train tickets, we learned that Euston Station was closed. A 2 ish hour journey became a 4 hour journey, via Marylebone and Birmingham. I had to get up at 6.30 and the trains were stuffed to the brim. In short it was really unpleasant. As I’d had a late night and a good drink, you can imagine the joy of standing for an hour on a packed train, before getting a seat. At Birmingham the train split in half and it was so busy some people couldn’t board. 

By the time we were in Manchester, we were pretty frazzled. But it’s a pleasant walk along the canal and it was one of the most enjoyable games of football I’ve seen. City won 5-3. Afterwards we had a curry and I’m writing this on the train back, Euston has reopened so it should be plain sailing.

It brought home to me the fact that often the best things in life come with a cost. Although the outbound journey was awful, I saw an extraordinary match and thoroughly enjoyed my day. I guess I’ll remember the journey for ever, one of the worst. But that is a price worth paying

The Saturday List #509 - The ten health tips I need to remember to stay well!

 If you'd just met me, byt didn't know me, you may well be surprised at what a sickly, unhealthy soul I am. On a visit to the Doctor a couple of years ago, I had a minor argument with her. I had been feeling unwell and I was concerned that it may be something serious. She did a quick examination, proscribed anti biotics and told me she'd write me a sick note so I could have a couple of weeks off work. I replied that I didn't want a sicknote, I work for myself and skiving costs me money. I wanted to make sure that it wasn't something more serious and asked her to have a quick browse through my medical history. 

After she pondered it for a couple of minutes she said "Oh". SHe then explained that most people who come in and are my age are alzy hypochondriacs who simply want permission to skive and its cheaper to give them some pills and a sicknote.  A whole range of tests were commissioned and a load of new conditions to add to the existing list were added. Fortunately none are at the stage where they are serious, so long as I am sensible. The problem is that I am not sensible sometimes.  Each condition has its own different list of things that need to be done to keep them in check.

So for your entertaiment and to remind me, here is my list of non medical remedies that seem to work.

1. Hiatus Hernia. I was diagnosed with this in 1984. I was prescribed Tagamet until they found it caused cancer. I am now prescribed Omnaprazol. But if I follow a few rules, I do not get acid reflux at all. So what are the rules. Drink a litre of water before I eat in the morning. Then have porridge, nothing greasy. Don't eat after 6pm, don't eat greasy food. Don't drink acidic drinks like orange juice. Don't overdo the alcohol.

2. Gallstones. This was a recent discovery. When I was first told I had them, I didn't recognise any of the headline symptoms, but after eating a very greasy burger at a music festival the penny dropped and I realised this has been a massive problem for years. The remedy is simple, don't eat more than 40 grams of fat a day. It can be a bit boring. I can have a bit more on occasions, but I've had my last greasy burger. Just as important is to also eat more fibre. And one other thing, which was causing all manner of problems, I have stopped fasting. This is very bad for gallstones.

3. Prostate Cancer. Well I had my prostate out, but I completely changed my diet when I was diagnosed in 2011 and it has made me feel far better, so I persist, even though, in theory, it is unnecessary. I avoid dairy and I add Pomegranite juice to tea.

4. Vitamin B Complex deficiency. I didn't eat meat for 16 years. In 2001, I started to get all manner of odd symptoms. I was even given an HIV test (I am not in a risk group). Then I mentioned to my Dr about the not eating meat. He advised me to go and have a big dinner of liver and bacon. He said "come back in a week". I did and all of the symptoms had gone, almost magically. He said "You had a vitamin deficiency caused by being stupid, eat liver at least every three months". I have done. No more boils on the bum.

5. Severe joint pain. I have played a lot of football over the years. I've broken many bones. I've been run over. There are more bits that hurt than don't. I can't take anti inflammatories since I had a stomach bleed in 1984. However, I have found out that if I take turmeric, I can get by. It eases the inflammation and I am still here.

6. Ankle and knee issues. This has been ongoing for several years. It was getting too much, but I saw  great physio, who recommended instep supports for my shoes. These massively helped. I can walk around 10,000 steps per day without pain. Sadly if I do more, it swells up and hurts and I have to rest for a few days and elevate it.  It was suggested that maybe a new knee may help, but actually the ankle is far worse, where will it end?

7. Spider bite. I was bitten on my ankle in Australia by a spider in 1987. It has never properly healed. I still get really bad itchy eczma at the point. However an Aussie mate told me to wash my hair with Head and Shoulders and then put some on the eczma and it will improve. It did. So long as I do it, there is little itching.

8. Tinnitus. This is in some ways the least of my issues and at times the worst. It can literally drive you mad. For me it started after an operation to remove an infected polyp from my ear in 1984. The only thing that works when it is really bad is alcohol, which ain't great for some of the other conditions. However, if I get overtired, it gets worse, so it is a balancing act.

9. Anxiety. When I was 13, I was diagnosed with anxiety issues and given medication that my parents zombified me. I actually thought it was depression until a friend who was a GP explained that the medication was for anxiety. It made more sense. After I had my stomach issues in 1984, I took up Yoga and meditation. I still periodically suffer with anxiety, but so long as I realised that is what is happening, I can control it by using relaxation techniques. 

10. Chronic back pain. When I was run over in 1988, I suffered a stress fracture in my L2 vertibrae. This has caused me significant pain ever since. In 2007, I saw a specialist and had an MRI. I was offered surgery, but there was a 20% chance of paralysis.I asked if there was another option. I had 26 sessions of physiotherapy. I now have a series of exercises and stretches that keep it at a just about manageable level. I also have massages and have had acupuncture. It is kept in check.

I played football until I was 60, I still play in a gigging band. I almost never take sick days, apart from medical procedures. I've never claimed benefits because I couldn't work. I've got the MRI's and X-Rays to prove all of these. I am a believer in the mind being able to drive you through anything. There are things I'd love to do Run a marathon, do the Camino. They are not possible, but I will go down fighting, We are all different. I have great sympathy for everyone who has any of the above conditions. They are all horrible in their own way. I don't judge other people, however for me. the first question I always ask is "What can I do to help myself?".  My Doctor advised me that I appear to have an extremely high p[ain threshold. I suggested that this was a good thing. She said "not really, most people get their issues sorted out rather than enduring them". I asked which ones could be mitigates with minimal side effects or risks. She had another look and said "Er, Nothing". 

In truth, so long as I remember all of these rules, I am fine. It's when I don't that it all goes wrong. 

Have a great Saturday. Here's a song I wrote about living with all of my ailments.

Everyone has a special power, what is yours?

 Many years ago, I used to work in IT support for a card processing company. I wroked in London, but the people we supported were based in Gateshead up north. I use dtos peak to the supervisor most days. Although she lived in Tyneside, Jackie was originally a Cockney and had moved up North when she married. I think she was a bit older than me, but we had a great rapport and a lot of banter. At the time, the terrible Soham murders occurred. I had  a 7 year old daughter at the time. I watched the coverage on TV and I commented to Jackie "That was awful to watch as a father" and commented about the distraught reaction of the caretaker, Ian Huntley. Jackie said "He did it, you wait". I was quite shocked when she said it. It is a terrible accusation to make. A few days later, Huntley was arrested. I was absolutely shocked, but I remember Jackie's comment. so I asked her how she knew. She explained that before she had kids she'd been in the Police. She said that she could instinctively spot the culprit and explained how many of the things the Police do are to trap people they suspect, getting them to reveal details only the killer could know. Even so, to spot  it from a two minute TV interview surprised me. Over the next couple of years, every time there was a high profile murder, she'd tell me the murderer before the arrest. I asked her whether it was all down to understanding police techniques, or was it something else. She replied "My superpower is that I can always spot someone lying, if there is a murder, why would someone lie, unless they were involved?". I said "But there are people who confess to everything, what about them, they are lying". She replied "Yes but they are attention seekers lying to draw attention to themselves, you can spot them a mile off".

I thought it was a real shame that Jackie wasn't still in the police, because she was very good at it. She explained a few dead giveaways on how to spot someone lying. Her technique was totally flawless. I am not in her league though. I was thinking about Jackie and her superpower yesterday, for no particular reason. It got me thinking of other people I knew who had superpowers. My Dad always claimed he could make weather and strange as it may seem, we believed him. One of my Dad's customers was a fairly major gangster. I can remember my Dad chatting to him over a cup of tea, when he collected his car. They were having a bit of a laugh over his nefarious activities. I'll never forget him saying "You know, there is no such thing as innocent and guilt, there is just getting away with it or getting caught". Dad said "So what is the secret of getting away with it?". He replied "I can spot a copper a mile off and I get a feeling when they are on their way and scarper". They both laughed. He went on "They sent one to spy on me, I twigged straight away and got him to get rid of the opposition instead". 

Another friend of mine sent me a message about ten years ago. She said "Be really careful in London, something terrible is going to happen". She had never said such a thing before, but I took heed. The next morning, I awoke to the news that Grenfell Tower was on fire. She messaged to say that this was the disaster. That is not a power I'd like, to be able to know bad things are coming, but do nothing about it. 

Sadly,not everyone's superpower is used for good. I have known one or two who an unfortuate talent for making people do things they don't want or shouldn't do. They almost seem able to cast a hypnotic spell over their victims. It always ends the same and the victims can never really understand how they fell for it. The US government and the Soviets spent billions on programmes designed to use and develop psychic powers for military gain. Depending on who you believe, this was either a stunning success or a terrible flop. I would advise anyone with any sort of telepathic powers to never tell a soul and only use them when no one is around. I suspect that if you don't you end up in a government lab, in most unfortunate circumstances

When I was a kid, I wanted the powers of Superman, but I realised that it is actually a terrible gig. I do have a rather strange superpower. I am very lucky. Not in raffles, lotteries, etc, but in life. The right people come into my life at just the time I need them. It is not a glamorous superpower, but I suspect it is the best one of all. 

What is your special power? Do you use it for good or evil? Has it made you money or just caused you grief? I'd be intrigued to know. 

Rock and Roll Stories #76 - The joy of playing live and the price to pay the day after!

I bumped into David Grant yesterday. BBC Radio London presenter and frontman of Lynx. During of the course of our chat, I asked whether he had any plans for gigs. He said that he was planning a tour with Lynx next year. He said he'd recently done a show at the Union chapel and he'd 'got the bug back'. It was funny to hear that. I lost the bug in 1990 and didn't perform again until 2002. When we put a line up together and played at the Red Lion in Colindale, it was amazing. The odd thing was our last gig before that in 1990 was something of a tour de force. We played really well, but I'd become jaded. 

It is now 24 years since we started gigging again. We've had a oouple of shows which weren't as good as I'd like, but even then they were fun. Since Tom Hammond joined the band, I think they've all been pretty amazing.  We play 10-15 gigs a year, not enough to become jaded but more than enough to feel like a proper gigging band. We put a huge amount of effort into the shows. For some, Tom makes special T-Shirts. For others, we plan special songs, or interval statements etc. We always give 100% to try and get people involved. When Tom first joined, I think he thought he'd be standing at the back playing amazing trumpet lines. Now he leaps into the crowd to incite them to join in on the chorus sections. The band is very interactive. We actively encourage audience participation. On Saturday night, we played at The Mill Hill Services Club, for cub members. A very different sort of gig to the last two. The previous one was a massive street festival, which was amazing. Before that, it was London's most iconic grassroots venue, the Dublin Castle.  Each was different in its own way, all were brilliant. We played 2 sets for the Services club, which is great as it meant that we played two sets, meaning the songs we don't play that often got an airing. It keeps it fresh. We probably have 15 really strong songs that suit the current set/line up and around 10 more which are more than good enough to play and I enjoy playing, which we don't play enough. Most of the time, we get to play 8-12 songs in a set. Before Tom joined on trumpet, we wrote some cracking songs, which do not really suit a trumpet though. It is great to give them a play through as well.

The band has massively evolved over the last two years. Tom sings a few songs now and we are getting Fil to sing more. This really helps, especially with two set gigs, as it means I can give my vocal chords (and everyone's ears) a rest. Both Tom and Fil have far more versatile voices than me. It makes the set more interesting and I think they bboth do huge justice to the songs. Derek Treadwell has also joined on percussion and backing vocals. Again it adds another layer to the sound, which makes us different. That is something I really appreciate. 

I put a huge amount of effort into my stage performance and expend a huge amount of energy. Now I sing, this is even more the case. When we finish, I am usually in that strange place that performers find themselves, where they are totally exhausted, but also buzzing with adrenalin. When I was a kid, my Dad, who was a WW2 bomber pilot told me that whatever the time, when they returned from missions, crews went to the mess bar. They were totally exhausted, but also completely wired and adrenaline from the sheer stress of the situation. It was only when I started performing that I understood the feeling.

So what happens is you do the set, then have a drink/celebrate/party. You eventually go home, hit the sack and wake up the next day completely worn out. Now I am 64, I feel knackered for several days. It takes longer to catch up. It is now Thursday and as I've had a really busy week, with no scope to chill, I am running on fumes. I couldn't get out of bed this morning. I like to go to the gym every day, but it is a struggle. The strange thing is that if I had another gig, or a rehearsal, the tiuredness would instantly disappear. The human body and adrenaline is a wonderful thing. 

If you look at major bands, like the Rolling Stones, they have been doing this for decades and make me look like a spring chicken. They are lucky though, they have an army to do everything. They just have to play. But even so, performing at the level the likes of Mick Jagger would is phenominal at any age, let alone as an octagnerian. It is almost impossible to explain just how much energy you expend just expanding and contracting your diaphragm to sing. Let alone do a 2 hour dance routine as well. 

If you consider that Mick Jagger is three years older than Donald Trump and the same age as Joe Biden, you realise just what a feat it is. I have been doing the main lead vocals role since 2022. I also play guitar. I love doing both, however, I have increasingly found playing the guitar to be constraining. I have considered even stepping back from playing guitar, but the band has a great dynamic and I am loathe to spoil it. But I do feel I could perform better as a vocalist if I could give it 100% concentration. 

I suspect if I did, I'd use more, not less energy, as playing guitar and singing into a static mic is a big constraint, and I can't move around and wave my arms around as I might like to. If ever the band starts getting paid more money, I will! Sadly it won't be in place until long after our next gig!