Councillor Andrew Harper - A very very bad boy

Mrs Angry has pointed out how deputy leader of Barnet Council, Andrew Harper always refers to Leader Lynne Hillan as "Madame Leader". Following his revelation that he "wants to go with Model X" at a recent council meeting, the Barnet Eye has been greatly amusing ourselves by doing a Google Image search on various keywords with Andrew Harper. It seemed logical to do a search of  the keywords ANDREW HARPER MADAME LEADER. Guess what popped up? Amongst other things this image :-

According to the Daily Mail, this is Madame Lash, a notorious Australian dominatrix. Now whilst there is clearly no connection between our esteemed deputy leader and this lady, it did cause me to reflect on the Cabinet of Barnet Council. With a couple of notable exceptions, all of the men come across as a bunch of rather weak, ineffectual and useless individuals. I never quite worked out why someone as useless as Hillan could become leader of the council, but it is clear that (again with a couple of exceptions) they are all scared to death of her.

Avid readers of this blog will recall that one of the first paid painting and decorating jobs I undertook, back in the 1970's, was to redecorate the home of a local madame. At the time I asked her how she managed to keep on the right side of the law. One of the tips she gave me was this "Coppers are always welcome for a free session and Councillors are always welcome for a free spanking". Now quite clearly, that was a long time ago and I'm sure none of our current bunch of Tory Councillors would ever indulge in such activities. It did however remind me of the scene in the film Personal Services (starring Julie Walters), about the life of notorious Madame Cynthia Payne. She had a whole bunch of silly old duffers, who used to tidy her house and garden, in exchange for a good telling off. That was enough to keep them happy (interesting footnote - much of Personal Services was shot in Mill Hill and the wedding scene was filmed at John Keeble Church)

Maybe this is the secret of Hillans success. Maybe she's realised that if you assemble a selection of completely useless men and tell them off on a regular basis, they will love and adore you forever (of course if you give them a big fat allowance, thrown into the deal, it helps no end). It strikes me that Harpers description of "madame Leader" is very Freudian. For all his many sins, Harper has never struck me as stupid. He must know that Hillan is not up to the job, yet for well over a year he has propped her up in her role. Last June he had the ideal opportunity to finish her off, but he bottled it. Why? She's been a disaster for the Barnet Conservatives and she's destroyed any credibility Harper may ever have had. He is now mortally wounded as a politician, for his role in such a bankrupt regime.


Lynne Hillan rather gave the game away on Monday night when she announced "There are places for sensible discussion and the Cabinet is not one of them". It reminded me of the classic Spitting Image sketch, where Margaret Thatcher and her cabinet are dining in a restaurant. The waiter asks Thatcher what she wants. She replies "Steak". The waiter then enquires "and the vegetables". Thatcher responds "They'll have steak as well".

How can we possibly make this bunch of dullards see sense? I've no idea. Maybe the "Madame Bloggers" of Barnet could borrow some clobber off Miss Lash, corner Harper and a few of his cronies and tell them they will be thrashed to within an inch of their lives if they don't get rid of Hillan. Sadly though, they'd probably enjoy that and decide to keep Hillan. Lord help us all.