Wednesday 12 April 2023

Do misogynist bullies have really small dicks?

 It's a rhetorical question. Please do not send me pictures, one way or the other to prove me right or wrong. Having said that, I've always been someone who sticks up for my friends, even if they are Facebook/Twitter friends. I hate bullies. Always have and always will. Recently, I've seen more and more examples of really nasty, toxic attacks on female friends on Twitter and Facebook. This is really widespread but I will stick to a couple of examples. When I first stood as a Lib Dem candidate in 2010, I came across Brent Lib Dem councillors Alison Hopkins. Alison is what I consider to have been, in many ways, a perfect Lib Dem local councillor. A local who got involved because she wanted to improve her area. What I particularly like about Alison is she is quite blunt and quite funny. What I particularly like about Alison is that she has no truck with racists and misogynists and takes no prisoners when engging with trolls. However, the abuse she seems to get is quite sickening. Have a look at some of what she has to out up with, if you are interested - twitter.com/Hopkins_Alison/with_replies

Another Twitter friend is Lorraine King, who happens to be black and is a writer for The Daily Mirror. Like Alison (who she exchanges much banter with), she is more than capable of sticking the boot into racists and misogynists, who clearly seem to have nothing better to do than spend their life posting idiotic comments with the sole point of upsetting her. Again have a look if you want to see what she puts up with  - twitter.com/lorrainemking/with_replies

As I follow them, on occasion their jousts pop up on my timeline. What I find really interesting is that when I've felt the need to stick my oar into the Trolls, to stick up for people I like, the twats never come back at me. It seems that whilst they are more than happy to bully women, they feel far more reticent picking fights with a bloke. This is a pattern anyone who has seen bullies in any walk of life will be familiar with. Bullies always pick fights with people who they think won't fight back.

I recall a situation in Edgware in the early 1980's, where Nazi skinheads decided to ttack young Jewish kids on a night out in Edgware. What they didn't take into account was that some of the Jewish kids had brothers who'd been in the Israeli army and Dads who had spent decades fighting fascists. The net result was that they got comprehesively duffed up. I saw all this first hand, after a night in the Beehive. We were getting a KFC when all hell broke loose. A bunch of thugs started to attack a group of young Jewish kids, when out of nowhere a group of rather fit and very handy men stormed in and comprehensively beat the hell out of the thugs. Although I am someone who abhors violence, I couldn't help but chuckle to see such Twattery thwarted. 

Sadly on Twitter and facebook, there is no such comprehensive and decisive victory. The twats simply move on to someone they percieve as weaker.  I've studied psychology as a hobby for decades. It is always good to understand what motivates peoples behaviour and why they do the things they do. When I was at school and in the workplace, I noted that bullies are invariably rather inadequate people, who are not thriving in life. They seek to take out their frustations on those that they think they can get away with, so it is usually smaller kids, females and outsiders. Sometimes they band together to form little gangs. There is a degree of mutual support and affirmation, but it is all rather sad in reality. 

Which brings us to on line misogynistic trolls. When they take on strong and confident women such as Alison and Lorriane, they invariably lose the argument. Some skulk off. Some start pretending that they are trained killers. Some simply start a new profile and it all starts again. But sadly, as they all seem to be a bit thick, the outcome is the same. They look stupid. 

Which brings us to why. Well when I am out with friends, at a party, having dinner, watching a band, having a romantic night in, etc, the last thing I want to do is start fights with strangers on Twitter. So the first thing we conclude is that they have nothing better to do. They are sitting in their bedroom, madly bashing their keyboards. Then there is the misogynism. Why are people misogynistic? I know of no one who has been successful at having happy relationships with females who are overtly misogynist. I know quite a few guys, who act like that for a period when they are young and then learn that it gets you nowhere, if you want a successful adult relationship. In short, they grow up. Many of the trolls Alison and Lorraine have to endure are clearly not teenagers. They are grown men. There is no evidence at all on their twitter feed or anywhere else of any joy in their life at all. 

Now I posted the rather offensive title of this blog to grab your attention. Why do blokes end up sitting, on their own,  in their bedroom, night after night, looking for women to insult online? Why do they feel so embittered that that's all they can think to do? I'm sure the suggestion I made in the headline is wrong, so please enlighten me. Is there a better reason?

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