Friday, 31 January 2025

Friday Fun 31 January 2025

 As is our tradition, we always start with a bit of fun.

I took our new car to the carwash for a valet yesterday. The guy asked me if I wanted it waxed. I replied that I hadn't realised it was hairy!

(Hat tip to Robert Wilkinson)

Borough of Barnet music round up.

Friday 31st
Elephant Inn 8.30 Dex & Mercy (funk soul)
Barrington 8.30 - midnight Karaoke with Johno
Ye Olde Monken Holt 9.30 pm – late DJ Sadie (DJ)
The Haven 8pm – 11pm Denis Cook – Musician/DJ)

Saturday 1st

Just Jammin' gig at The Three Wishes
Just Jammin' (Rock / Blues, 4 piece) at The Three Wishes, Edgware 
info icon9.30pm - 11pm

Butchers Arms 9pm – 11.30pm Rockit Science (Rock/covers)
Ye Olde Monken Holt 9.30pm – midnight James Or (Acoustic Covers)
The Arkley Club 8pm -11pm £5 cash Pip in Boots (Pop/rock)
Maddens 9.30pm – midnight Undercovered (pop/rock/funk)

Sunday 2nd
Maddens 7.30pm – 11pm The Cruisin Mooses
Butchers 8.30pm – 11.30pm Pauls Jam

Monday 3rd
Ye Olde Mitre Inn, High Street 8pm – 11pm (stables room) Barnet Acoustics Sessions

Tuesday 4th
Black Horse 7.30pm – 11pm Open Mic Night
Maddens Bar 8pm Open Mic Jam hosted by Jeff and band

Wednesday 5th
Ye Olde Monken Holt 8.30pm – 11pm Open Mic Night

Thursday 6th
Ye Olde Monken Holt 8.30pm – 10.30pm  Traditional Irish Session (Irish Folk)

And finally, please put a note in your diary to come along to The Dublin Castle to see The False Dots 46th Birthday party on Sunday 16th February at 2pm. There are two amazing bands playing with is with strong Barnet connections, Pete and The Lovehearts and The Colours!


Thursday, 30 January 2025

Rock and Roll Stories #23 - How the False Dots started a full scale riot in Mill Hill in 1979

In the history of The False Dots, there has been a hell of a lot of fun. There have also been some rather dark moments. Perhaps the darkest and most unlikely was the Mill Hill riot of 1979. This saw a massive fight on Mill Hill Broadway between a gang of Mods and gang of Teds and Rockers. One of the rockers car got set on fire, in his drive on Hartley Avenue. Not the usual Saturday afternoon that you associate with Mill Hill! So what happened? Well given that The False Dots were neither a Mod or a Rocker band, it is a strange tale, that entered the hooligan mythology of Mill Hill, but almost no one knows why it happened. The truth can now be told.

It all started about a month before, in June 1979. I was walking down Mill Hill Broadway with fellow band member Pete Conway. We had a band rehearsal and we were walking from my house to our studio in Bunns Labe. As we turned onto the Broadway, walking towards us were three blokes dressed in a Mod style attire. They were a bunch of likely lads from Burnt Oak, who I'd never seen before. As they approached us in our punk rock attire, one of them made a comment to Pete saying he looked like something you found under a hedge. Pete responded by ridiculing him, with pointing out that he looked stupid wearing a Fred Perry shirt with a tie. As used to happen, before we knew it, we were all squaring up to each other. Pete was quite small, but I've always been a big guy and I got in the leaders face and told him to do one. They backed off and walked down the road issuing profanities. Pete yelled at them "My names Pete Conway, your worst nightmare" or words to that effect. I'm not really into violence, I was happy they backed down. Pete was all for starting a fight and called me a pussy or something, for letting them "get away with it". 


A couple of weeks later, I'd forgotten about it. I went to a gig in town and arrived at Burnt Oak station on the last tube home. I'd missed the last bus.  As I started to walk back, I heard a shout. One of the "Fred Perry and ties" shouted from behind me "Not so brave now without your mate". I turned around and the three likely lads were there. I didn't like the odds. They chased me all the way from Montrose Avenue to the Bridge at Mill Hill Broadway. By this time, my adrelanline was pumping and I was furious. I was fit and have always been a decent long distance runner, so I easily outpaced them. They were totally out of breath. I turned around and shouted "Stay there, I'll be back in a second and you'll be sorry". They shouted "Come on then".

In an act of supreme stupidity, I ran home, picked up a crowbar and ran back. When they saw me running towards them waving a crowbar, they lost their bottle and ran. I chased them all back into the direction of Burnt Oak, screaming all of way. I lost them in Lyndhurst Park where they hid in the bushes. I realised how stupid I was being and went home. A day later, I told Pete what happened. He thought it highly amusing. I realised that it could have got very ugly. A couple of weeks after that, Pete and I were going to see Crass, the anarcho punk band in Town. He was meeting me at my house and we would get the tube up to town. At the appointed time, Pete turned up. He was in a terrible state. He was covered in blood with his lip almost hanging off. We were shocked. It seems that he'd got off the bus in Mill Hill Broadway and bumped into The Fred Perrys. They had given him a proper beating and told him to pass on the message that I was next. I realised that it wasn't fun anymore. My mum wanted to call the Police and take Pete to the hospital, but he was adamant he was going to Crass, so we patched him up and off we went. He said he "wasn't a grass". 

Two weeks later, I was in the Wimpy in Mill Hill with four of my mates, who were in the Polecats. I was at the counter ordering a burger, when the Fred Perrys walked past. Seeing me, but not my rockabilly mates, they entered looking to 'settle the score'. As soon as they entered, they realised their mistake and we chased them out. They scarpered, but challenged the Rockabillys to a ruck the following Saturday. The Polecats had a bunch of Rocker / Ted mates and at the appointed time, they gathered at the Wimpy. I think maybe they thought that a rockabilly riot would give them some notoriety. A group of 15-20 Rocker/Teds had gathered for the ruck. At the appointed time, a larger group of Mods turned up. There was an almight punch up. One group of Mods broke off. One of the Rockers lived on Hartley Avenue and had a customised car with a Rebel flag on his drive. The Mods set it on fire, whilst the main ruck was taking place on the Broadway. The police eventually turned up and everyone scarpered, with both sides claiming victory. Most of the participants seemed to enjoy the experience. It wasn't what you expected in sleepy Mill Hill. One of the Fred Perry's, the original protaganists, had been given a good duffing up. We assumed that was the end of the matter.

Sadly, it wasn't. Two weeks later, The False Dots had a band rehearsal. Our drummer was a guy called Dave Edwards at the time. His girlfriend Mandy was the sometimes singer. After the rehearsal, Dave and Mandy were waiting for a 221 bus back to their flat in Finchley. The Fred Perry's had spotted the four of us walking from Bunns Lane. Pete and I went to the pub, the Railway at the Green Man for last orders. They decided to follow Dave and Mandy. As they waited for the bus, the Fred Perrys ambushed them, throwing Dave through the window of WH Smiths as Mandy screamed. Their crime? Being Pete Conways mate. Dave received a severe laceration of his arm. He managed to get away and tried to run up the Broadway. They followed him and threw him through the window of the Jewellers, where Rockman is now. One of them severed a tendon. Luckily for Dave, a Police car passed. Two of the Fred Perrys were arrested. The one with the severed tendon was taken to hospital. Dave had run off, but the police found him by following the trail of blood. He was also taken to A&E, sitting opposite the bloke who'd thrown him through the window, who was handcuffed to an copper. 

The two Fred Perrys who got caught were given eighteen month custodial sentences. Dave left the band and I never saw him again. Mandy came to see us in Camden in 2011, and told us they'd split up a year or two later. As for the third Fred Perry? Well about six months later, Pete Conway excitedly called me. Pete was working at Dewhursts in Mill Hill. Fred Perry 3 had just been taken on as an apprentice butcher. Pete said that the manager, Mickey Rees always went to the bookies at 12.30. As soon as Mickey went to 'lunch', I appeared and we bundled the said chap into the meat fridge as he protested that it wasn't him, it was the other two. We left him in there for ten minutes, only letting him out when he stopped screaming. Rather oddly, Pete ended up becoming friends with him, having decided that scores were settled. 

I'm not a fan of mindless violence. Graham Ramsey, who is our drummer now, was a Mod at the time and recalled the events, but never knew what it was all about. All he recalled was that the local Mods were well up for a punch up with the rockers. I also discussed it with Boz Boorer from the Polecats. Boz didn't get involved in the trouble and could only recall the car getting set on fire. No one seemed to recall what it was all about. Two people in prison for 18 months one with a severed tendon, someone with a severe laceration, a classic car set on fire, a riot in Mill Hill Broadway. Why? Because someone objected to being wound up for wearing a tie with a Fred Perry shirt, as two musicians went to a band rehearsal.

The whole thing set the band back a year. We split up when Dave officially left in September 1979. We'd been scheduled to support The UK Subs in Derby, Pete was mates with them. That never happened.  We had an interview with Xpert-I fanzine that went horribly wrong. Pete and I reformed the band in January 1980. We did our first gig in December that year. Our then drummer Dav Davies recorded it on a cassette player. This was what we sounded like! We celebrate our 46th Birthday as a band on the 16th February 2025 at The Dublin Castle at 2pm. Please come along. We promise you a riot, but only in a good fun sense!


Wednesday, 29 January 2025

Should the British state execute Axel Rudakubana for his crimes?

The terrible crimes of Axel Rudakubana in Southport has once again raised the subject of capital punishment. Should he be hung for his crimes? This is a subject that I am sure we all have a strong opinion on. As someone who has long opposed the death penalty, such cases are deeply problematic for me. Firstly, in this case, which is absolutely cut and dried, if we had the death penalty on the statute book, I'd shed no tears if Rudakubana was hung and I'd make no argument against it. Murdering children is inexcuseable and the planet would be well rid of him. As far as I can see, there is no realistic prospect of him ever being released. I would suspect that he'll have to be kept apart from ordinary criminals for the rest of his life. You could probably argue that it would be kinder to put him out of his misery. There are only two ways his life will develop. He will either realise the error of his ways, and if there is an ounce of decency in his soul, he'd accept his fate and not complain or petition for release in 52 years, or he'll go to his grave thinking he was right. There must be no prospect of him ever coming out, in my opinion. He will be 70 when he's elegible for parole. I know plenty of 70 year olds who are fit and healthy, so as far as I am concerned, he would still be a potential threat to children.

However, the real world situation is that capital punishment is not on the statute book in the UK, whether we like it or not. To change this situation, we'd need to change the law. Sadly, Axel Rudakubana has already been sentenced, so even if we could rush a bill through Parliament, it would be no use at all in his case. You can't change the law and then change the sentence. Sadly, the law doesn't work like that. You may wish it did, but do you really trust politicians with the power to change peoples sentences after the process of law has been applied. The law works in the way it does to protect us from dodgy government. So the best any of us could hope for, would be to get a change in the law on the books for the next Axel Rudakubana. Whilst we all hope that such a person doesn't exist, none of us would be genuinely surprised if another such monster exists.

The horrific truth about lunatics who are motivated by religious fanaticism, is that often they believe that the death penalty will guarantee them a free ticket to heaven as martyrs. It might possibly encourage such people, as their sick logic thinks it will give them the key to heaven. Being locked up for life doesn't give them the free ticket to paradise that they so desire. Now, it may well make us all feel better to see them sent to Hell early, but I'd rather they were discouraged from their sick folly by removing the offer of a free pass. 

As to changing the law. As far as I am concerned, if we had a referendum and capital punishment was restored, anyone who voted for the proposal would be personally responsible for the death of every person executed, just as they would be if they pulled the trigger or the hangmans lever. I can honestly say that in the case of Axel Rudakubana I'd have no personal qualms pulling the lever. The man is a monster, but sadly the UK has a history of catching and demonising the wrong people. The IRA bombings in Guildford and Birmingham saw just this. There were calls for these innocent people to be hung at the time. No one culpable has ever faced justice for these atrocities, which is a scandal as big as the wrong people being locked up. No justice for those victims. The idea that not only the innocent victims of the bombs, but the poor suckers who took the rap would all be dead now is horrific, as I am sure that they'd have faced capital punsihment when convicted, if it was on the statute books. 

When there are horrific atrocities, there is huge pressure on the police. When culprits are caught literally red handed, such as Rudakubana, the police job is pretty straightforward. When they are not caught at the scene, there is huge pressure to offer up a sacrifice. Nothing made me more aware of this than when Jean Charles De Menezes was shot on 22 July 2005. I was working in Aldgate and it was pure luck I wasn't on the tube that was blown up on 7/7. I knew personally a few victims from our office. Martine Wright MBE, who lost her legs on that day's brother Grant is a schoolmate. When the news came through, into our office that a "terrorist" had been shot (when the news of Menezes death broke), we all cheered and went to the pub to celebrate. We felt safer. I joked that I'd have shot him myself if I had a gun. Then we found that Menezes was an innocent man. The police lied about the circumstances. They lied about their mistakes. I hang my head in shame to this day, thinking about my response. 

To this day, when I visit Aldgate to see mates and have a beer and a curry when passing through Aldgate, I see the memorial to those killed. Every time I see that, I say a private prayer for their families and prayer of apology to Jean Charles for my shameful response on the day of his death. A quick google showed that there was a 20% rise in miscarriages of justice claims in 2022. It rose from 1,198 to 1424. Twenty five cases were referred back to the courts, incuding six murderers, and seventeen were overturned. So, if for arguments sake, five murderers a year are wrongly convicted, that would be potentially fifty a decade, who potentially would be hung when innocent. This was one of the reasons that capital punishment was originally abolished. I don't want the deaths of innocent people, often fitted up by the Police because they are vulnerable, on me. 

There are three other reasons that capital punishment can be counter productive. The first is that juries are far less prepared to convict people if they think they may be executed by the state. No one wants innocent blood on their hands. More people will walk free, if there is the slightest doubt in their mind and clever lawyers make their livings planting such doubts in a credible manner. The second is that someone like Rudakubana would have an incentive to plead innocent and put families through the mill and maybe, just maybe, get off. He pleaded guilty at the last minute. Of course it was cut and dried, but we all know that lawyers can sometimes find loopholes and legal arguments, that would let a monster walk free. The third reason is that the police will have to put far more resources into cut and dried investigations, due to the two reasons above. They simply couldn't risk the prospect of someone like Rudakubana finding a loophole or trading on the sympathy of a few anti capital punishment jurors to get off. Bear in mind, juries are randomly selected members of the public and a sizeable percentage of people do not agree with capital punishment. You only need three out of twelve and that is a mistrial. We'd see more mistrials and retrials and jurors bottle the decision. 

The world isn't perfect. With my mystic Meg hat on, I'll make a prediction. We've not heard the last of Rudakubana. I fully expect other prisoners to attack him. I don't think he will live long enough to see his parole date. He is a marked man in prison. He will have few, if any friends inside and he's got his whole lifetime ahead of him, stuck on his own, watching his back, having God knows what added to his food. It is a miserable, pathetic existence. As time goes on, I expect to see apologists for his behaviour come out of the woodwork. I expect to see people claim he was just a child. I expect to see people claim that he was the victim of the system and an injustice. All of that is to come. 

And then there are the families of the three little girls. Their life sentence is even worse than Rudakubana's. They don't have to watch their backs, they don't have to check their food, they don't have to sit in solitary confinement. But those Mums and Dad's will never have a day when they don't feel the loss. Losing a child is awful beyond comprehension. To lose it to a monster, and face a lifetime of being reminded is horrible. At some point, they will turn on the telly, radio or look at a website and see some bleeding heart making the case for Rudakabana. That is the most awful aspect of their life sentence. In truth, they have already been the victim of capital punishment. Rudakabana mercilessly executed a part of their heart. He does not deserve to live, but in this sick world, we have to share our oxygen with him.  

The title of this blog is Should the British state execute Axel Rudakubana for his crimes? if the law allowed it, of course it should, but at the same time, given the place we are, we have to accept that it won't happen, because if we allow the law and then sentences to be changed retrospectively to suit public mood, we will end up in a far darker and more dangerous place, where dodgy governments can go after those they deem to be troublesome, after the court has taken judgement. 

The only solace I can really take is my belief that he will never be released, he will have a horrible life, always watching his back, locked up with other monsters. If any of the bleeding hearts who feel sorry for him have any real compassion, think of the parent and STFU. At least give them some peace and quiet to grieve in. 

I must finish this piece by stating that of all the blogs I've ever written, this was by far the most difficult. I have never felt more revolted by a case or had a more difficult challenge to my personal beliefs. I am prepared for a barrage of people telling me I got it wrong. But if you are a blogger and you feel strongly about something, it would be cowardly not to speak, not to advance what you believe are rational arguments and to bury your head in the sand. I deliberately did not discuss the issues around whether Rudakubana should have been labelled a terrorist, not because it isn't important, but todays blog is solely about his sentence, not the issues around his background. For the record, I think when you attack children, for any reason, be it if you are a paedophile, a terrorist, a lunatic or just someone having a bad day, you should be locked up and the key thrown away and the reasons really don't matter. 

 If you disagree, by all means leave a comment. If it does not contain profanities or libellous statements, I'll publish it. We still live in a free country and we are all allowed a view. Write to your MP, write to the Attourney General, write to Keir Starmer and Yvette Cooper (Home secretary). We deserve answers and we owe it to the parents to get them. 

Tuesday, 28 January 2025

Rog T's Food Blog #2 - Pub Snacks - Tuesday is food day

Welcome to the second installment of my food blog. I promised that this blog would be different to most food blogs. Today we look at a topic that is a much overlooked genre of bar food, one we often don't even give a second thought to. The good old bar snack. As I've said on many occasions in this blog over the last seventeen years, one of my greatest pleasures in life is to sit on my own in a pub, with a pint of the finest ale, a bag of nuts and the Evening Standard.  Not a session, just a quick drink, a moment's quiet and a snack, before facing the journey home.  I've written a song about the joy of doing this, it didn't make the final cut of our album release, but it's a song I rather like. A demo version is still on our Soundcloud page (See the Bottom of the page)

Sadly, the Standard is no longer published. It has been superceded by people staring at their phones. There is a whole generation who doesn't know the serenity of a pint of warm beer, a pint and a paper. On Saturday, I had a pint and a bag of crisps in the Dublin Castle in Camden. I was passing through and had fifteen minutes to waste. Sadly no paper to read. Nonetheless the pleasure in just wasting fifteen minutes of my life was wonderful.

As often happens in such moments, I got to thinking about the blogs I had planned for the week. I got to thinking about the bag of crisps in front of me and my food blog series. I have no idea of the total value to the UK economy of bar snacks sold with pints etc, in pubs in the UK in a year. Whilst the pubco's that have embarked on a mission to ruin our pubs have decided that "food is the future of the pub industry", there are still some of us that actively avoid foodie pubs when meeting up for a drink. That doesn't mean we don't get a bit peckish. In Spain, they invented the concept of Tapas. These were small snacks, that you nibble as you drink. Originally, Tapas were things such as olives, small bits of tortilla and perhps fried potatoes with a chilli sauce (patatas Bravas). Now we have Tapas restaurants. The concept has been lost. The food is accompanied by the drink and they have full main courses. 

When I started going to pubs, often the snacks were free. You'd see little dishes of crisps and salted nuts on the bar. On a Sunday, it would be salty roast potatoes. These were salty snacks, given freely to make customers more thirsty and drink more beer. The Pubco's then cottoned on to the idea that they could charge customers to make themselves thirsty. Now we have to buy our own snacks.

Now when such snacks were free, I never thought about it. Now the quality of such snacks in most pubs irritates me. Now I am not calling for pubs to become Tapas bars. Sure I'd love small plates of chorizo and gambas with my pint for a couple of quid, but I'd settle for a little bit more imagination. Most pubs these days sell Walkers crisps. To me, these are horrible. The Salt and Vinegar crisps use acetic acid rather than viengar (citric acid), it is shrp and tangy but has no flavour. The less fat crisps have the flavour of cardboard. The cheese and onion crisps taste of sweaty feet, not cheese or onion. As for the nuts, they sell Nobbys nuts. These are all uniformly shaped. They are designed to please the eye, not the tastebuds. They taste of wood chips. If you get proper, old school nuts, such as KP, you notice that the nuts are odd shapes. They are different types of peanuts, the round ones have a different taste to the flat ones and are more expensive for the suppliers to buy. In short, the old school nuts are a better product. Next time you are in the pub, bet some KP nuts and contrast how the different shaped nuts taste. 

Some of the best bar snacks are rarely found. Pork Scratchings are rare, pickled eggs even rarer. I cannot recall the last time I had a free roast potato. Now for the pubco's this doesn't matter. They look at profit margins on products. They are run by bean counters, who do not understand the value of a premium brand. They are not interested in selling beer, they want the food sales and see snacks as potentially damaging this. People eating crisps are taking up the space that a customer spending ten times as much on a plate of substandard food might spend, or they would be if pubs were full....

However, it is rare that I've been in a full pub recently. The exception has tended to be in central London and generally the pubs are pubs that are wet pubs (focus on selling beer). I've noted that these tend to sell better quality crisps and nuts. They also appear to have staff who know what they are doing. Maybe it's just me, but when I am in a pub and the beer is good and I enjoy the bar snacks, I am far more likely to make a mental note to go back. Of all the foods, it occurs to me that bar snacks have the most subliminal effect. No one will concsiously ever go to the pub because they sell great crisps and nut, but if they do, you are likeley to feel happy and develop a liking for the pub. 

I'll end with a few of my favourite bar snacks.

Whelks with black pepper & vinegar. Not had them for years. Back in the day, you'd get blokes with trays doing the rounds of pubs. Whelks, Cockles and Prawns all on offer. I've not seen one for donkeys years.

Roast spuds. I've mentioned these a few times. Delicious with a pint of  best. There was a time when all the local pubs would put them out on a Sunday.

Picked Eggs with salt and pepper. An acquired taste. I especially liked one of these inthe pub after I played football on a freezing Saturday afternoon in January. It just seemed right.

Burts sea salt and malt vinegar crisps. Taste like proper crisps. There was a phase when these seemed to be everywhere, now hard to find, even in supermarkets. They actually taste of salt and vinegar.

KP Original salted peanuts. The best. Simple as that!

Monday, 27 January 2025

Environment Monday - Why are British governments so addicted to mega schemes when there is so much that could be done quickly and cheaply

A new runway at Heathrow is once again being talked about. In the UK, nothing frustrates me more than the fact that it takes forever to do even the most basic necessary things. The reason for this is that Central government is addicted to mega schemes, which take decades even to get off the ground, when there are such simple, cheap and obvious ways to deliver real improvements in transport, with a positive environmental impact that could be delivered almost immediately. 

Let me give one example. There has been a proposal on the board to build a passenger rail service called the West London Orbital (WLO) from Hendon to Hounslow via Old Oak Common and Brentford. The railway is already there, it is a lightly used freight line. It only needs resignalling and stations building. It will enable 14,000 homes to be built in London with good transport access, relieve congestion on the North Circular, and bus crowding. The economic case is as sound as any project can be. It was first proposed in 2017, yet they are still doing feasability studies and there is no cash. It will be a real benefit for Londoners

You ask Sadiq Khan which project he'd prefer. I think, I'm no expert, that WLO would cost half a billion quid and the benefit to London would pay for itself in fifteen years, if I understand the business case properly. Anyway, my point is all the public enquiries etc, we've had over the last 50 years would have paid for WLO five times over.

Now I hear you saying "But that is whataboutery, WLO will not deliver new airport capacity, when I want to fly to Benedorm, I can't take the WLO".  Take a step back and consider the bigger picture in UK transport, something the Government seems incapable of doing. Whilst you can't take a train from London to Benidorm, there are plenty of trains from London to Manchester, Newcastle, Glasgow and Edinburgh. A huge chunk of capacity is used providing these local flights. This traffic has been fuelled by the low cost of air travel. Whilst the cost of air travel has come down, the cost of train travel has gone through the roof.  The simple economics mean that many take an Easyjet or Ryanair for a short haul flight, than a train. Given that train travel has a miniscule impact compared to flying, it is ridiculous that governments have a blind spot for this. Since the channel tunnel opened, a large chunk of air travel between Paris and London has moved to rail. This shows that it can work. Opening up local routes like WLO make access to rail link easier. My view is that the WLO should use battery powered trains and run through the Thameslink core. Whilst there is not capacity in rush hour, there is during the rest of the day. For people in West London, having easy access to Central London in off peak hours, would make a huge difference to travel planning. It would make getting a train to Paris or Brussels more attractive and also make it easier for people working shifts to get in and out of town. The trains could also continue North to Luton and Luton Airport. Making Brent Cross West a fully integrated chaning point with East Midland Trains would also improve access to the North. 

I am not anti air travel, but we should build the best sustainable transport links we can, and we should be looking for creative ways to move people around. A big part of that is giving people cheap fares, especially when the network is quiet, so that we change the way we plan our travel. The owners of Easyjet and Ryanair have made billions by recognising that putting bums on seats at quiet times works. Why don't our rail companies? What I find particularly galling is that when Labour came in, they cancelled a swathe of schemes to reopen rail lines in the UK. Why? It was a Tory project. To me that was plain irresponsible and they should be looking at creative ways to raise finance for schemes that improve public transport.

Sunday, 26 January 2025

The Sunday Reflection #39 - When friendships end

 Perhaps the most difficult lesson I've learned over my 62 years circling the Sun on planet Earth is that sometimes. you just have to let things go for your own happiness and wellbeing. When friendships end, it can be painful. I am not talking about relationships, where you are in love, then you are not. That is a whole different thing, far deeper. But we rarely talk about the ending of more casual friendship, where thre has been no sexual element, where we just spent time in someones company because it was good fun and then for whatever reason, we find that we simply cannot be around those people. 

I am a very loyal friend. I stand up for my friends, I try and be there for them. Sometimes friends make calls on your friendship that place a huge burden on you. When they have a bad time, you share it and you worry. But that is part of being a friend. When they cry, you cry with them. In my book, you don't abandon friends when they are going through a rough patch and are not much fun to be around, and need your support. So when do you cut the ties and move on? When things become toxic. What does this mean? I have had a few toxic friends over the years. People who's company always comes at a cost. My friendship is unconditional, however it has to be based upon respect. If someone lacks respect for me (or my family) then they are not worth the effort.

This week I've seen two stark contrasts in friendship, that have put a burden of sadness and grief on me. In one case, it was a burden I was more than happy to shoulder. One of my dearest friends saw the death of the mother of their children, in a sudden and unexpected medical tragedy. It was a horrible situation, but I made myself available for them, we had a drink, I have been doing what I can to assist with sorting out the debris of the legal mess that it left. My only concern is that I can't do more. I do this knowing that the care and concern would be reciprocated.

The other example of friendship? Well I don't want to go into it in too much detail, but it has left me feeling let down, angry and physically sick. Someone who I believed to be a friend to me and my family has behaved in a despicable manner and to compound it, they've been completely cowardly in what they've done. What really irks me, is that they are someone I've done everything I can to support over the years, with disputes with the local authority and planning problems. I've long known that they don't always deal with things in a rational way, but I've always excused this, as I felt that deep down, they are a decent person, with a degree of honour and courage. Sadly, I've learned that the honour and courage I perceived, did not extend to basic decency. I have come to realise that they are someone who is a bully, who is quite happy to abuse their position and behave in an atrocious manner towards people who they feel are not in a position to defend themselves. I've not been on the receiving end of this, but I have directly seen the effects it has had on people and it has, for want of a better description, angered and sickened me. What makes the whole thing far worse, is that they have not taken responsibility for their own actions and made other people do their dirty work, which to me is extremely cowardly.

What makes me even more irritated is that their actions potentially should have a huge financial effect for them, but they've made a calculated decision that the person who has been on the receiving end of this will, perhaps out of a missplaced sense of loyalty to other people who may be affected, not fight for what is rightfully theirs. This person was a close friend. As far as I am concerned, that is over. I cannot excuse such behaviour. Maybe in a year or two, I might tolerate being in the same room as that person and be polite, but at the moment, I feel like punching them in the face. I am not a violent person, but even thinking of their behaviour makes me well up with anger.

Thirty years ago, when my wife was pregnant with my eldest daughter, I realised that I did not deal with stress and anger well. I didn't want to have children and lose it. I booked some sessions with an anger management therapist. By and large, this has mitigated the worst of my moments of Red Mist. This week was a challenge. I even said to my wife, as I left the house "If I am not home in two hours, I've punched ****** in the face and I'll be at the Police station". The lessons I learned thirty years ago kicked in. I took some time out, I asked myself what good such an action would do. I told myself that if I did such a thing, I would be the bad guy. I would be the one with the problem. And then I did the most powerful thing I could. I wrote down my thoughts. You are reading the fifth edit. 

I am incredibly hurt, angry and cross. But I refuse to let someone who has no moral compass undermine my beliefs in non violence, rational thought and the power of love to conquer all. I will not be punching anyone. If I see the person, I will simply disengage. I refuse to accept their gift of anger and hatred. My asssumption is that should they ever see this blog they will shout "C**T" and badmouth me. All I feel is a bitter sorrow that they are so blinkered that they cannot see what they really are. 

There are times when things depress me. Get me down. This week may well have been one, but I have a wife and three children and I have to show them the right way to deal with things. What is the right way to deal with a callous betrayal of friendship? The answer is quite simple. I have shaken the dust from my shoes, my anger has subsided to be replaced with sorrow and mourning for someone who I used to think I knew, but I realised all I saw was a pale reflection in a mirror. And I've made an arrangement to see a friend for a beer who warrants my friendship and needs my support.

Tomorrow I will wake up and the Sun will rise and God willing it will shine on me. It will warm my soul and I will start the rest of my life, without someone who was not deserving of my friendship. The ending of a friendship is a moment of sadness. The most tragic thing is that all I've lost is something I now realise I never really had in the first place.

And with that, have a great weekend. This track rather sums up my feelings when I wrote the first draft of this blog, especially the first verse. I'm OK now though.






Saturday, 25 January 2025

The Saturday List #469 - My top five "Oh yes' moments

 This week Donald Trump was inaugarated as the 47th President of the United States of America. I deliberately avoided as much of the coverage as possible. I believe in democracy and if that means we have Donald Trump as the US president, then so be it. I can recall discussing politics with my Dad as a teenager and he gave me a brilliant insight. He said "No on is ever as good as hope or as bad as you expect in politics". I thought I had a clever answer and retorted  "What about Adolf Hitler? Surely he was worse than anyone could have thought". Dad's answer was a great insight into why you should listen to people who have been around a bit and know a thing or two. It was considered and very sharp. He said "Well lets consider first what his supporters thought, when he became the Feuhrer in 1933, they believed there would be a thousand year Reich and that he was the future. Within fifteen years, there dreams were in ruins, he was dead and fascism was banished completely" (Dad passed away in 1987, so he thankfully didn't see the current rise, which would have alarmed him, given the sacrifices of him and his comrades in the RAF in WW2). He then said "And those of us who despise Fascism and Nazis genuinely feared that Hitler might win and the World would have been a very bad place. He didn't" . He then added, "I must add that the reason he didn't win is because people stood up to him, volunteered to fight and many, including Spud (the rear gunner in his Wellington bomber who was killed in action) paid the ultimate sacrifice to stop him".

There are two moments from the inauguration that will be remembered. The first was a real "Oh no" moment. Elon Musk giving a Nazi salute. As someone who has no doubt that Elon Musk is an incredibly clever man, who knows what he is doing and as far as I can tell understands exactly how such gestures will be received. Seeing his subsequent tweets, I also see a man who thinks the rest of us are nowhere near as clever as he is, and that we'll fall for his rather dodgy explanations. Now I am a certified thicko. Youngest of six, the only one with no post school education, poor exam results. But I can spot a fraud a mile off. You don't run a business for 46 years without getting a good nose for people trying it on. I suspect that we'll be seeing a lot more of Mr Musk and I also expect more provocations. Is he really a Nazi or is he just winding everyone up? If you subscribe to the concept that all publicity is good publicity, then maybe it is all just a facade. I mean surely someone who is a South African, raised in the Aparthied era and the son of a wealthy mine owner couldn't have such views, could he?

Anyway that isn't what this list is about, this is about the "Oh Yes" moments. These are the moments when you expect nothing, but something happens that shocks you in a wonderful way. 

Of which the Bishop who presided over the New Presidents Church service gave us. She chose to remind Mr Trump that the central plank of Christianity is the Beatitudes and that he should show compassion and be a president for everyone. Jesus was a political refugee. Most hard right Americans have a very Old Testament view of the Bible. Jesus put a layer of compassion and fogiveness on top. I loathe talking about religion. It can me offputting and devisive, but I'll make an exception, as I believe that what the Bishop did was both courageous and proper. In her own way, she did what Spud did on my Dad's bomber. She chose to put herself in the line of fire. Make no mistake, there are people in the USA who will not have liked what she said and have easy access to guns. So when you hear people calling her a "soft liberal" think for a second of the soceity she lives in and some of the people she upset. That is true courage.

I must say it is nice to see a Bishop speaking truth to power, doing their job, rather than covering up for paedophiles and then being their apologist. 

In honour of her courage, here are my top ten Oh Yes moments. 

1. I had to start here!

2. I had to include a football moment. For me, there can only be one. Wembley 1999 The second division (third teir) Football play off final at Wembley. Manchester City are in the doldrums. Having gone down to the third teir, they had a poor start to the season, the campaign bumbled along. They were, in a word pretty rubbish. United did the treble. They stumbled into the play off final. I got a ticket and took my nine year old nephew. As the 90th minute approached, CIty were 2-0 down to Gillingham, playing rubbish. The sky blue half of Wembley was in despair. The Gallagher brothers stormed out with the hump. I told my nephew to believe. Then Kevin Horlock pulled a goal back. Too little, too late. Then this happened. Despite all of the trophies since, this was the ultimate football Oh Yes moment. Nothing since would have happened if this hadn't happened. 


3. Music is a bit different. There are few Oh Yes moments, because unlike football, there is no real jeapordy. You like a band, you go and see them or listen to there music. It's good. Sometimes you get pleasantly surprised, but it is unlikely you'd go and see a band that you didn't like and then suddenly realise that they were great. However, I have one moment that was a real "Oh Yes" moment. It was on the 8th April 1979. I was really into punk. One of my favourite bands, The Damned were playing at The Lyceum. The main support were the UK Subs, another band I loved and who had offerd The False Dots a support slot for a summer gig in Derby. They were mates with our bass player. Bottom of the bill were an unknown Ska band from Coventry. I knew nothing about them, but I always checked out the support bands. They were The Specials. I remember getting a beer and making my way to the mosh pit. I had no expectations. I knew of Ska, but only really as the music of the school disco's of my youth and from football terraces. I didn't think it was very exciting and I couldn't understand why a band would play Ska instead of Punk. I went to take a sip of beer as they started their 30 minute slot. As soon as they started playing, my jaw dropped. The beer didn't reach my mouth and I stood wide eye'd staring at them for the set. They blew my mind. I got it. 

4. Whilst on the subject of music, I was thinking of my own band The False Dots. There have been a few "Oh Yes" moments. But to be a real "Oh Yes" moment, something has to happen that is truly unexpected. That moment happened in September 1983 when Venessa Sagoe, a brilliant soul singer joined the band. A mate of mine was trying to put a band together with his girlfriend. The girlfriend was a flatmate of Venessa. They asked her to come down as a 'backing vocalist'. Venessa was a striking looking, half Nigerian, half Jewish woman, who was both striking, powerful but strangely vulnerable and innocent to me. They had a rehearsal at our studios and I had a listen. She had the most beautiful voice I'd ever heard. To my amazement, when the song finished she walked out and looked a bit upset. I asked what was up. She said that they had said she wasn't good enough. I was gobsmacked. I told her she was brilliant and they were mad. A week later, my band mates called a band meeting. They informed me that I was no longer required in the band. Our bassplayer, to their amazement, said "If Rog goes, so do I". I then informed them, that it was my band and they were sacked. I immediately got together with bassplayer Paul Hircombe and said "Don't worry, I've got a new singer and a new drummer and we'll advertise for a guitarist. The old singer had been female. She was OK, but not great. I knew Venessa would be ten times better and we actually would have a chance of getting a deal. I phoned her. She came for a play through the material. Whereas the previous singer had simply been given lyrics and sung them in a monotone, way, Venessa immediately started to stamp her authority on the songs. My plans to simply get her singing the old songs went out the window. When I asked her, I thought it would be the sort of duff pop we'd been playing with the previous singer. Venessa delved into my lyrics file and found one song, Action Shock. It was only half written, but she loved the lyrics. SHe asked me to play it. I'd only bothered working our a repetitive two chord progression before I got bored. So I played it on my acoustic to her. She loved it. A week later, having worked out eight songs, we had our first rehearsal. I genuinely thought that when we did Action Shock, Venessa would realise it was rubbish. The sings we played until then were fairly soft pop songs. For Action Shock, I smashed on the Fuzz Box and started playing it with a dampened rock beat. As soon as Venessa came in, Paul and I looked at each other. When we got to the chorus, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. Oh Yes...

We still play the song and finish the set with it. Sadly, you have to listen to me singing it rather than Venessa, but that was a moment.

5. So we've done politics, football, music and where do we finish? Well as most of my wonderful blog readers know me from the blog, I thought I'd have to mention a blogging moment. It may shock you to know that the moment was provided by Eric Pickles, the former local government minister, praised the efforts of the Barnet Bloggers for holding a Tory Council to account. The Local Government Chronicle reported

He praised local bloggers, including Barnet Eye, Mr Mustard and Mrs Angry, for helping to “uncover this misuse of public money”.

To me, that was vindication of the work I'd done and an acknowledgement from someone who was not an ally, but was clearly a sensible man.  Don't let anyone ever tell you that fighting for your beliefs is a waste of time. The finances of Barnet Council are in chaos and the council is at risk of becoming bankrupt. The work of myself and my fellow bloggers, in exposing scandals like the Metpro scandal, saved the council millions. The inquiry that followed revealed massive weaknesses in the way Barnet procured services. It is clear to me that the hours we put in saved Barnet Council Tax payers a lot of money. It would have saved them a hell of a lot more, if they'd actually listened to us about the One Barnet Capita outsourcing programme. 

I try and write a blog that is funny, interesting informative and sometimes does some good in our community. Barnet needs more bloggers. Sadly, most of the others seem to have retired, semi retired or don't really cover Barnet anymore. I am genuinely suprised that there are no Conservatives outraged by the mismanagement by Labour of Barnet, writing vitriolic blogs about how useless the council are. It is hard work keeping a local blog going. Surely I am not the only person in Barnet who dislikes what Barnet Council are up to and am not too lazy to put views out there?

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I will add a little footnote here. I left out many moments, when my beautiful wife first kissed a scalliwag like me, when I realised my kids took after their mum rather than me and are intelligent, when I found out that a couple of my old school teachers (stand up John Shuttler at FCHS and Bob Wright at Orange Hill) actually quite liked me, when Lee Thompson of Madness agreed to play sax on one of my tunes, when Huw Lloyd Langton of Hawkwind got up and jammed with The False Dots for my 40th Birthday, and when the Burnt Oak Boogie video went viral and strangers started complimenting me on it on the streets, because I thought it sounded like boasting about how clever I am which is most unbecoming. But yep, they were Oh Yes moments as well. I am always surprised when things go right. Luckily experience has taught me that if you stick at it and work hard, good things happen.