Tuesday, 9 December 2008

Roge'T's guide to Barnetcouncilspeak

Following on from my blog yesterday about words going in and out of fashion, I thought I'd publish a guide to the jargon and terms used by our beloved Barnet Council. I hope this helps - Please note that this is the first draft, please correct any incorrect terms as this is a work in progress for the poor Council Tax Payer of Barnet

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Regeneration - Concreting over large areas of green space and building rabbit hutch flats on them.

Future Shape - A scheme to get outsource (privatise) council services and remove them from democratic control of councillors.

Cabinet - A self appointed clique within the council ruling group who take all the important decisions and get paid lots more money

Leader Listen - A propaganda exercise to raise the profile of the leader and deputy leader who happen to be prospective parliamentary candidates in the borough, excluding political opponents

Responsibility allowance - A sum of cash given to selected councillors for something or other????

Public works board - A place to borrow money from to invest in failed Icelandic banks at rates higher than the current Bank of England Rate

"No one could foresee" - An excuse regularly employed by the Council leader when things don't quite work out as he hoped.

"Conference equipment" - Plasma screen telly for senior officers desks

Reasonable travel expense - Business class tickets to the USA

Officers training budget - Used to pay for Business class tickets for CEO to go to Seminar in USA

Ordinary Conservative Councillor - Someone not allowed to debate cabinet decisions

Vote of Confidence - Convenient method of deposing "off message" council leaders

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I hope this helps you pick your way through the minefield of jargon when dealing with the Council !!!!!

3 comments:

do call me dave said...

You sound like such a bitter old fool it is actually rather funny.

Rog T said...

Bitter? Actually I prefer Guinness. As to being a fool, you're probably quite right. After all it takes one to know one.

Don't Call Me Dave said...

How about: "Election. The process by which Barnet residents vote for their leader." Oh no sorry, that's not right.