Is Barnet becoming a Police state?

I was stunned to read the latest press release from Barnet Council. It is entitled :-

Enjoy the World Cup responsibly this summer

(click here to read the whole thing - http://www.barnet.gov.uk/press_releases.htm?id=2224 )

The press release ends with the following statement :-

Councillor Joanna Tambourides, Cabinet Member for Community Safety and Cohesion, said: "The World Cup is a time when the whole community enjoys the feelgood factor, and the council is totally supportive of residents enjoying themselves while watching the football. What won't be tolerated is anti-social and violent behaviour that intimidates or harms others simply trying to enjoy the games. We will work closely with our police colleagues to make sure that any problems are quelled quickly and effectively."

Does the phrase "We will work closely with our police colleagues to make sure that any problems are quelled quickly and effectively" sound like what you'd expect a councillor to say about the World cup? It surprised me to see that this is, so far, the only Barnet Council press release on the subject of the World Cup. Nothing trying to capitalise on the huge interest in participent sport, which will doubtless ensue. Nothing to get youngsters off their backsides and out  into the parks playing football. No special events to use the World Cup to promote community cohesion (just think how many different nationalities, who live in Barnet are represented). All we have from  the Police is this statement :-

Inspector Simon Roberts, in charge of Barnet Police's Priority Intervention Team, said: "Naturally we want England to go the whole way and win, and we want people to enjoy every moment of it. While we think the chance of any real problems arising is low, passions do tend to run quite high in these sorts of events. We will deal robustly with any disorder and alcohol related offences during South Africa 2010."

Is it just me or are we becoming rather authoritarian in Barnet. Are the Police saying they don't normally deal robustly with disorder and alcohol related offence? Are they saying that they are simply targetting World Cup revellers?

Even more worrying is the following statement in the press release :-

Enforcement and police officers have extra powers in the Cricklewood, Tally Ho, Finchley Central and Hendon Central areas where there are alcohol control zones now in place. If there are people drinking in the street and officers suspect they may commit anti-social behaviour they can demand the alcohol is handed over. A £500 fine is the maximum penalty for refusal.

So the Police have been given the power to sieze alcohol if they think someone "may commit anti-social behaviour". Lets get this right, you don't actually have to do anything. So if I go for a picnic in Finchley and have a lager and a policeman decides "I might commit anti social behaviour" he can nick my booze?

This is completely bonkers. There are acts of anti social behaviour actually happening all of the time in Barnet, which go unpunished, which the police totally ignore, but they can nick the booze of anyone they think "may commit an offence during the world cup?".

It flies in the face of English law to allow Police to punish people for crimes they haven't committed. They have drafted 30 extra officers in to deal with "football related trouble" but refuse to deal with all sorts of other trouble. Sure, bunches of bare chested blokes drinking lager and shouting "England" isn't the most edifying of sights, but what sort of a world are we coming to.

I suspect that the real cause of this press release is the fact that Councillor Joanna Tambourides and her ilk are snobs who hate football. I suspect that they consider normal working people who actually know how to enjoy themselves to be oiks and that they would ban all revelling if they possibly could. I seem to recall Brian Coleman telling Ken Livingstone with great glee, how he'd scuppered plans for a large screen for people to watch games on in Hyde Park. I suspect the reason that Brian doesn't understand the thrill of watching football over a few lagers with your mates is because he hasn't actually got any mates.

How much do you pay for your childrens Birthday party?

A friend sent me this link - http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/CollegeAndFamily/RaiseKids/KidsPartiesatSpareNoExpensePrices.aspx - it seems that for some people, having birthday party for their children is a competive sport. I did a quick google and there were plenty of other stories of "extravagent partie". We are not talking Bahmitzvah's or special birthdays (18th or 21st). Just run on the mill birthdays. My son recently turned 10 years old. We asked him what he'd really like. He said he'd like all of his mates to come around for a huge water fight. We asked him about food. He said he'd like a barbeque and a cake. He said they could have their fight, eat a barbeque, watch Doctor Who and then have a bit more of a water fight.

As a result, we hosted about 10 boys from 2pm until 9pm on Saturday. Total costs £60 for a bouncy castle, about £20 for Iceland bargain barbeque packs, about £25 for various cakes and £15 bottles of pop. Add a few quid fopr lagers for the dads and wine for the mums when they came to collect and we're done.

A couple of the boys parents rang up to say their boys had slept like logs and had told them it was agreat party. Having a sunny day and a decent sized garden helps, but it reinforces my view that you don't have to spend a fortune for young people to have a bit of fun. When Matt announced that he wanted a "long party" from 2pm until 9pm, we had our worries, but as it turned out they were great. He was proud that it was his baby and his mates had a great time. I'm a great believer in letting them get on with it and they did. The best thing was that apart from the much needed break to watch Dr Who, they spent the whole time away from the telly. It confirmed my view that town planners who plan homes without gardens are criminals.

Guest Blog - The Brent Cross Incinerator

By Phil Fletcher,

If Jonathan Joseph really wishes to dispel myths about the Brent Cross Cricklewood project, then perhaps he should be more open about what Energy from Waste options he is considering there.

As far as I know, apart from classical incineration, there are two other methods of obtaining energy from waste – pyrolysis and gasification.

Pyrolysis is the heat treatment of waste in the absence of air. Gasification is the heating of waste with limited amounts of air to several hundred degrees Celsius, rather like the process for making coal gas.

Since Mr. Joseph has claimed there are “Energy from Waste” plants operating

in Germany, I contacted various organisations, the Oekoinstitut Darmstadt and the German Friends of the Earth, to check. I received the following information.

Pyrolysis and Gasification have been all but abandoned in Germany.

I was told there is only one functioning pyrolysis plant in Germany, in Guenzburg, near Ulm, Bavaria. This has been running for 10 years, and apparently has been fraught with problems, and is not technically efficient or economically viable. Although the Bavarian Government normally favours incineration, to date they have not built any further plants.

Siemens has constructed a large scale gasification plant in Fuerth, near Nuremberg, but this has never operated commercially, due to an accident. Apparently, the springs from incinerated mattresses rolled themselves together, penetrating the lining and allowing pollutants to escape. Some workers were injured and the vicinity was contaminated. Siemens hasn’t brought the plant into use, or built a similar plant since.

Finally, there was a pilot project in Karlsruhe. This operated at 2000 degC to destroy pollutants, the effluent gasses being suddenly cooled to prevent dioxins from forming. But the gasses at 2000 degC were so corrosive, that the lining was destroyed within a short space of time, and would have needed frequent replacement. As there were continual breakdowns, the contractors abandoned the project.

It would be good if the Brent Cross developers could be more forthright about their plans. They are clearly not ready to apply for planning permission.

Phil Fletcher

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Phil Fletcher is the Coordinator of Barnet & Enfield Friends of the Earth. Guest blogs are always welcome (so long as they are vaguely relevant to the topics we cover here at the Barnet Eye). 

World Cup injuries - proof that there is a God?

As we ponder the forthcoming world cup, the airwaves are full of injuries. I was listening to a couple of pundits this morning saying how tragic it was that Rio Ferdinand and Didier Drogba had got injured and had to come home. Really? Wasn't Rio Ferdinand the guy who skipped a drug test? Now I'm no expert but if she was an olympic athlete, that would have been the end of her career? I don't want that bloke within a million miles of the England team. What signal does it send to young footballers (cheating is OK?). The Drogba. A man built like a brick out house, who only needs someone to breath on him and he falls over, writhing in agony. Your average Chelsea match sees Mr Drogba go down more often than Linda Lovelace in her entire movie career. In short a cheat. As I pondered the discussion, I thought to myself "God moves in not so mnysterious ways sometimes".

At the time I was making Mrs T (the wife, not the blogger) a spanish omlette for breakfast. Just as I was thinking this thought, I sliced a potato in half. Now I'm not one for stories of the name of Allah being displayed in Aubergenes, but the evidence of divine intervention is beyond doubt in this case. I shall call it the Miracle of Mill Hill. See for yourself, the proof is in the potato! A message for Mr Capello and all of the other coaches.

The good lord demands an end to cheating in football and I thoroughly agree with him !

Put me in the Spotlight !

If any of you have no plans for next Friday (June 11th) night and want to have a truly amazing night, why not head down to the Purple Turtle in Camden Town. My band, the False Dots are supporting the notorious Bollock Brothers featuring Jock Mc Donald. We'll be on stage at around 8pm.

For those of you unfamiliar with the work of Jock and his band of Brothers, they hit notoriety by releasing a version of "God Save The Queen" sung by Michael Fagin, who famously hopped over the wall of Buckingham Palace and nipped in to HM the Queens bedroom for a sherry and a chat.

We have a truly fantastic singer, Koni A, singing with us and I promise that if you don't see Koni soon with us, then you'll be seeing her at some rather larger and more expensive venues. We've just been putting the finishing touches to her first single and video and it is truly awesome. The pictures on this blog are some stills from it. It will be a fantastic night of music.

Having run a music studio for 31 years and had such great talents as Amy Winehouse  and Kate Nash pass through the doors before they were signed, I think I can say that I can spot a great talent and Koni is right up there. She is an awesome singer and when we saw the first rushes of the video, we realised she's great on the screen as well.

Weekly News Roundup - tour of local info blogs

First some news about whats been going on in the local blogosphere. It appears I have a rival on my doorstep, here in Mill Hill for the affections of the people of Mill Hill ! It seems that a cheeky young upstart has launched a Mill Hill Broadway Blog, the nerve ! Now I like a bit of competition and so far it has been quite an interesting read. The bloggers mission seems to be to promote business in Mill Hill, which is a thoroughly commendable objective. The blogger doesn't seem too interested in local politics (and who can blame them). The blog is still finding it's feet, so I'll be interested to see a few more detailed restaurant reviews, a few more detailed write ups of some of the more interesting businesses and maybe a few trips beyond the confines of the Broadway (Finchley Nursuries, The Three Hammers). One thing I've always fancied doing was a "nights out by bus and train from Mill Hill" detailing a few easy to get to places. The Broadway blogger mentions their love of Portuguese wine, so maybe they'd like to jump on a Thameslink train 2 stops up the line to Radlett and check out a fine Portuguese bistro their called Lagar. Anyway, we'll watch with interest. Most interestingly, the author of the blog hides there IP address when leaving messages so their ID is a complete mystery. Maybe I'll have to drag myself out of bed at 8am and see if I can catch a happy snapper in the Broadway, as that appears to be the time they take their pictures. The profile picture appears to have been taken from one of the flats above the Broadway. Some of these were raided by Police a couple of years ago in a clampdown on Prostitution a couple of years ago (I'm not suggesting that the Boradway blogger is up to no good). I wonder if we'll see any blogs on this aspect of commerce in Mill Hill "Hidden Mill Hill Special". I did discuss doing some such reseearch for a blog myself, but Mrs T (The wife not the blogger) suggested that would result in a trip to A&E to get some appendages sown back on.

Now if you are a Barnet Based reader and you are feeling left out, a local sound engineer (what is it about sound engineers and blogging?) has launched his own blog about Barnet - www.barnet4u.co.uk - There's a nice write up about it in this weeks Barnet Press. Again this blog is in its infancy, but appears to be a useful local resource.

There's also the well established Finchley blog - http://www.finchlinks.com/ - rather amusingly the guy who runs this blog, is not a fan of the Barnet Eye. He described it in rather unflattering terms and then was deeply offended when we responded in kind (to another blog he wrote not Finchlinks). As a result he refuses to put a link to us on his blog. Oh well never mind.

Also a quick mention of the Coalition for a sustainable Brent Cross blog. Unless people start listening to these guys, then the London Borough of Barnet is basically shagged. And finally, if you just want to read a really great blog - check this out.

Follow the Yellow Prick Toad?

We're off to see the Wizard !

I had a bizarre dream last night and I realised I'd been transported to a horrible parallel universe called The London Borough of Barnet. This is ruled by the wicked witch of the west, a horrible character who abolishes wardens for sheltered housing, leaving the elderly, frail and vulnerable home alone. She seeks to get rid of all of the little munchkins (council employees) who get decent terms and conditions and replace them with evil flying monkey minimum wage contractors under her evil plan (called future shape program).

She has a rather odd team helping her. A young girl in ruby slippers called Fiona Bulmer tried to stop her, but the cunning witch bought off her chums, stole her ruby slippers and banished her to the wastelands. Her chums were a man of straw (known as Andrew Harper) who wanted a brain, a tin man (called Brian Gordon) who wanted a heart and gutless lion (called Robert Rams) who wanted some courage. The wicked witch captured them and told them that whilst she couldn't grant their wish, she could make them all cabinet members and give them loads of wonga. Sadly for Fiona, they fell under her spell and shafted her.

Now unbeknown to the wicked witch, there is someone scheming away behind the scenes, someone she thinks is a friend. This is the Wizard of Odd. He's a little chubby man, who has spent years fooling everyone that he's a big boy and has magical powers. He even managed by smoke and mirrors to install his mate, Mikey Munchkin as the boss for a while. The Wizard of Odd loves to dress up in bling. He takes great delight in being as horrible as he possibly can to everybody, but strangely thinks everyone loves him. He delights in titles such as "worshipful Mayor" and "Grand Master of the Zorch Munchkins" but sadly has ended up back as plain old Brian. He has a magic mirror in his parlour, which when you look at it, reveals your true character. He once tried, but only found a toad staring back at him. He dreams that he will banish the Wicked Witch and he will be the true ruler of the London Borough of Barnet. Sadly he's too cowardly to actually threaten her as he knows she has the power to transform him back into a toad permenantly. He knows his power is really an illusion, which will only last as long as everyone is fooled by his buff and bluster.

He knows the witch has an army of flying monkeys, willing to do her bidding, his own team of winkies are no match for them. In my awful dream, I am the chronicler of doom. The Witch appears before me and says "You can watch it, but you cannot stop it, Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha" and disappeared in a puff of smoke. Her army of flying monkeys descends on the London Borough of Barnet to turn out the wardens, sack the staff and collect the tax. I look on and watch the whole train crash happening and can do nothing. She then appears before me holding a toad in the palm of her hand. She says "Say hello to Brian, now what can I do to you" .Just as doom is about to strike, I click my heels together and wake up.

Fortunatly, I live in Mill Hill, the sun is shining and I've woken up. I realise that eating a nice large piece of Roquefort cheese and a couple of glasses of the finest red wine from Mill Hill wines is not a great way to get a good nights sleep. I'm just glad I don't live in a place like that.

Bork Update - Voted Conservative in Barnet - Is this what you expected from them?

It's less than a month since the Tories won Barnet Council. Was this in their manifesto?

http://www.times-series.co.uk/news/8199423.New_jobs_worth___300k_created_by_council/

It seems that Barnet Council thinks that the best way to spend £300,000 of your money in these times of hardship is on more managers. The jobs :-

Assistant director of strategic finance job, which boasts a salary of £110,000
Assistant director of financial services  for £90,000-a-year
Audit and risk management assistant directorship for £90,000

Why does a London Borough need an assistant director of Strategic finance? What does it entail? “management of the corporate business planning process” and managing the council's “transformation programme”. Given that if that's an assistant post, there's two people getting huge salaries doing this (at least). The spec contains the following rather alarming statement - "A sophisticated finance function is critical. We need to be creative, enabling, with balanced risk taking, whilst maintaining robust stewardship of increasingly tight resources. We need people who can create new models, for types of organisation and partnership forms that don’t yet exist anywhere else." In other words, us, the Barnet Council Taxpayer are the guinea pigs. What usually happens when the public sector tries to set things up from scratch?

Assistant Director of financial Services? “creating a high performing culture that drives improvement and efficiency savings”. Again there's at least two of them, as this is for an assistant. The spec goes on "An understanding of local government finance and current best practice is essential, ideally with experience of dealing with a financial services provider." So ideally an assisatant director of financial services should have experience of dealing with a financial services provider (that's a bank in English).


The Audits and risk manangement assistant Director? They will be “essential to meet the challenges to come”. The Spec goes on "With the ability to analyse complex information and issues, and the inter-personal skills to convince your colleagues, you will offer extensive audit and risk management knowledge and experience, preferably gained within a local authority context." Let's get this right. They think the person, on £90,000 per annum should have the "inter-presonal skills to convince your colleagues". This person is managing risks. This is crap, all they need to have is the skills to say "do that and you'll get the sack".



I've got a better idea. Why doesn't the council stop inventing highly paid jobs, which they've never required before. The descriptions are written in gobbledygook and are packed with phrases from the Borking manual. By the time of the next election, this mob will have cost over a million pounds. Would the people of Barnet be any wiser or wealthier if they weren't appointed.

I just hope some of our local Mill Hill Tories, John Hart, Brian Schama and Sury Khatri have a bit of sense and rebel against this profligacy. Now is not the time to start inventing jobs. I wonder how long it will be before these assistant managers need assistants to deal with all the Bork they create

Mike Freer MP : Should they let him out on his own?

My good friend Mike Freer, MP for Finchley and Golders Green is displaying his usual proactive prowess in his new job as MP. If you want a really good laugh, check his latest Tweet

http://twitter.com/mikefreer/statuses/15306117691

I have to agree with his erstwhile colleague Brian Coleman that (at least in Mike Freers case) Twitter is for Twits. What does Mike say :-

"Wk 4 and still no sign of a desk, stationery etc." 

This was the bloke who used to run Barnet Council. Oh the indignity, no personalised stationary, no desk. Is it beyond the wit of this man to knock up a template in word then nip down to WH Smiths buy some paper and print his own? How much does a box of paper cost? One of the things which always infuriated me about my former MP, Andrew Dismore, was the expensive paper and the full colour printing on the many letters I recieved from him. What is wrong with black and white ordinary paper. There are over 600 MP's. How much of our money is wasted having special stationary made for these pampered pussies? 


You can just see them all sitting in the tea room whinging. It makes me sick. If someone can't figure out how to get a desk or how to print a bit of stationary on his computer, should he be an MP? Should he even be allowed out on his own? The worst thing is that he's silly enough to think that we're interested enough in his ineptitude to bother tweeting it. Most of us figured out he was useless long ago.

My best ever job (an essay on the joys of mistreating animals)

Let me tell you about the job I enjoyed most. I worked at garden centre in Finchley (long gone and replaced by a housing development) for a couple of months in the early 1980's. During the "growing season" they would employ a few extra hands to help with loadings and deliveries. There were many reasons I loved the job. I was out all day in the open air. It was strenuous physical work which I enjoyed (loadiing and unloading bags of peat, compost etc). Dealing with the customers was fun (most gardeners are lovely people). There was also a rather attractive blond called Susan who worked there who I was rather keen on. Whilst that was clearly the best part of the job, a close second was the guard dog. When I turned up, there was a compound at the end of the yard, almost hidden from customers, with a large German Sheppard dog called Winston. If anyone approached the dog, he'd go completely bonkers. One of the owners used to exercise him on a daily basis and this process started with the owner tooling up. This involved putting on protective clothing and carrying a large stick. The last job of the day was to let Winston out so he could roam the place and eat any intruders. The first job of the day was to get him back in his pen. Being a dog lover, I was rather upset when I approached this huge dog and he went bonkers. He clearly wasn't pleased to see me. A quick enquiry of the owners told me "He's psychotic, he's not a normal dog, but he's a great guard dog, stay well away".

Well, I've never been one for doing what I was told. Every day I'd bring a selection of tasty treats in for Winston and at various times nip along to his pen and give him something. After a couple of days, he'd see me and bark in a friendly manner, wagging his tail. The owner, who had been bitten several times by Winston, noticed and said "You can take him for his walk if you like". As this meant an hour of doing nothing except walking a dog, chatting to other dog walkers in the park and having a crafty smoke on the job, it seemed like a great idea. I'd always have a pocket full of bits of bacon rind, old sausages, etc which ensured total obedience. After a couple of weeks, I decided to see if Winston could be trained. It turned out that this psychotic monster was highly intelligent. Not only could he sit, I trained him to jump over benches, retrieve things I'd hidden and all sort of other things.

One of the worst problems I had with him was that as soon as he saw another dog, he went bonkers. As he was probably the largest German Sheppard I've ever seen, this presented a problem. The owner who walked him dealt with him by clubbing him with a stick (and then Winston would bite him, if he could). As I thought about this, I realised that every time he saw another dog, he realised the owner was anxious. As a result, he got anxious and went bonkers.He then got clobbered so he got angry. How do you fix this problem. You take the stress out of the situation for the dog. It took a week, but he got the idea. As his social problems diminished, I started to get to know some of the other dog owners (mostly attractive young mums). They told me how they would not buy from the nursery as the owner was so mean to the dog.

After I'd been working there for about three months, something happened. By this time, I'd let Winston off the lead and throw sticks for him. He was the perfect dog. One of the other dog walkers was an extremely attractive young woman, who asked me if I fancied a coffee. It seemed like too good an opportunity to pass up. The two dogs were happy playing. Anyway, rather than the usual hours walk, I ended up being gone for two hours. As I returned, the management team were looking highly anxious. Where had I gone? What had the dog done? I'd already prepared my cover story.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Winston slipped his lead and it took me an hour to get him back". The owner started screaming at me that I was an idiot and that he had to be controlled at all times. He then said "I hope you gave him a good hiding when you caught him". As he said this, he waved the stick at me. Winston was none too impressed and bit him. I immediately pulled Winston off and made him sit. The owner then started hitting him with the stick (even though he was now passive). I screamed "Leave the dog alone". At which he sacked me on the spot (Just for the avoidance of doubt, the owner wasn't Brian, who was the manager and later bought the business and is a lovely bloke).

I felt terrible. I toyed with the idea of stealing the dog but I had nowhere to keep him. I felt like I'd betrayed him. A couple of years later I was talking to someone in a pub about guard dogs. They told me that the best way to train a guard dog is to get someone they don't know to creep up on them when they are asleep and beat them with bamboo sticks. Apparently this makes them aggressive towards anyone who creeps around who they don't know.

At the time I was a teenager. I went home and told my folks I'd been sacked. My Dad asked "what for". I told him that I'd told the owner to stop beating the dog. The old man asked why he was beating the dog and I said "Because the dog bit him". The old man asked why the dog bit him and I explained what happened. The old man thought it was hilarious. He said "He must have been chuffed, he's been paying you to look after his dog and you trained it to bite him". It confirmed my Dads opinion that I was a complete idiot. As I got older I've realised that many of my dad's judgements about me at the time were spot on. I must say that this was one judgement one which I think I'll always disagree.

I don't think it's ever right to beat dogs and I think that if you do you deserve to get bitten.