Friday, 28 March 2014

The Friday Joke and ten ways to tell there is an election coming

Guess what? There is an election in the offing. Here are ten tell tale signs to look out for

1. Politicians in ill fitting suits suddenly appear in pictures in the press planting trees -  - those of us who've dug holes for a living will note the lack of ability to hold a shovel properly

2. MP's who've been invisible for the past four years start popping up in pictures at schools 

3. MP's pop up in the press taking credit for decisions they had no role in

4. Tax cuts are announced for the first time in years

5. Smiling councillors you've never seen before suddenly start doling out 'community awards' to Grannies and young children.

6.Councillors you've never seen in daylight start appearing concerned about the local health service, doling out small grants

7. Leaflets start arriving containing all manner of misleading information

8. Councillors suddenly become concerned about all sorts of petty bureaucratic charges, announcing they've suddenly been abolished’s%20party%20time%20as%20fee%20is%20axed

9. MP's suddenly get terribly concerned about the local jobless

10. Councillors you've never heard of before suddenly start pretending truly appalling stats about education figures are marvellous so a story which says "Thousands of local schoolchildren are not getting a suitable school place" Becomes "Seven out of 10 win place at first-choice secondary school" with a picture of a smiling councillor.

You may or you may not think all of that is starting to make democracy a bit of a joke. If you don't the here is this Fridays joke !

   'Viagra' is  now available
in tea bags.
It doesn't enhance your sexual performance
but it does stop your biscuit going soft.

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