Sit down, make sure you are prepared for some astounding news!
As a long time citizen of the Republic of Mill Hill, I have seen many strange sights and heard many unusual tales. Today tops them all, the Bunns Lane UFO crash, the Lawrence St ghost and even the mythical tale of when Pete Trayling bought a round of drinks at The Hammers!
But my friends, it is true! I was there and saw it with my own eyes. For us priveliged few, there were laughs, smiles and high fives! Yes I was on platform one at Mill Hill Broadway, this very day and the 7.17 service was ALMOST ON TIME!!!!
I know that it is hard to believe that such an occurrence could occur on a Monday morning in the year of our Lord 2016, but trust me friend, it did. Not only that, but the driver APOLOGISED for leaving the station 90 seconds late!
I dare say the management of Thameslink are now in line for a huge bonus for providing such exemplary service, and well they deserve it!
I am now rushing out to buy lottery tickets, as it is my lucky day. Say what you like about President Trump, but at least the trains are running on time!
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