Thursday 2 July 2009

Great Britain will join the Euro within 5 years


That Rog T, he's really lost the plot this time !

That's what you laugh as you read this headline. Well,I may be wrong, but I have good reason to say this.

The reason - the most powerful man in Great Britain wants us to and what he want's he gets. Who is this man? None other than Peter Mandelson. He's not a mug, our Peter. He's a very shrewd operator. He knows exactly how much of a liability Gordon Brown is. He knows that the best Labour could possibly hope for, even if they pull off a miracle, is a small majority. With rampant rebellions, nothing could get done. Great Britain PLC needs some pretty strong medicine. Like chemotherapy, that medicine will hurt nearly as much as the illness. Who better to administer the pain than David Cameron and the Tories. Let them take the blame, so long as they've not got a proper working majority, it really doesn't matter. They'll be out again in a couple of years. Then the time & conditions will be ripe for the event that will write his name amongst the political superstars.

Here's the timeline

January 2010 - Britian starts a borrowing lead recovery from recession, Labour poll ratings improve, but not enough

May 2010 - General election - Tories form a minority government propped up by Unionists

June 2010 - Brown resign's, Mandelson anoints Gordon Brown's replacement. Tories pass vicious austerity budget.

September 2010 - Camerons cutbacks start to bite. His poll ratings slump & the economy plunges into recession as the borrowing lead mini boom ends. European economies grow.

Feb 2011 - Tories lose first by-election. Hospital wards close, school rebuilding slows. New Labour leader rides high in polls.

May 2011 - One year in. Osborne resigns amid failing economy. Ken Clarke becomes Chancellor, to "save the day". Boris Johnson distances himself from Cameron, lining himself up for a post Cameron tilt at the leadership. Announces that he's standing down as mayor after term, to concentrate on being an MP.

September 2011 - Mass demonstrations as Tory cuts bite deeper. Nurses & teachers pay frozen, interest rates rise to 8%. The economy stagnates.

Jan 2012 - Mass Tory rebellions over unpopular bills, Cameron struggles to hold his divided party together. Ken Clarke takes unpopular but necessary action to stabilise the economy. Hints that the only lon term solution is the euro.

May 2012 - Ken Livingstone retakes Mayorship, from hapless Tory rival. Boris finds a safe seat. Massive Tory losses in Council election.

September 2012 - Ken Clark, Peter Mandleson & Nick Clegg announce cross party campaign to join Euro. Tories backbenchers go ballistic. Unionists withdraw from government after by-election mauling. Cameron loses no confidence motion.

October 2012 - Labour wins general election. Tories hopelessly split, Labour announce that Great Britain will join the Euro on 31st December 2013 (when everyone is partying & looking the other way).

November 2012 - New Tory leader elected.

March 2013 - Economy recovers. Labour hailed as the saviour of Great Britain, Ken Clarke ponders what a funny old world it is as he gifts a Labour government a second golden legacy.

September 2013 - RBS shares recover to £2.75, LLoyds share to £4.30. Government announces sale to fund huge program of hospital and school building. Labour takes 20% Lead.

Jan 1st 2014 - Peter Mandleson walks down to Boots to buy some tablets for his hangover. The Cashier says that will be 5 euro's your Lordship

My advice to any Tories who want to stay out of the euro - vote for Gordon Brown, you know he'll never make a decision. What about Peter Mandelson? He's not that popular in some sections of the Country, but I suspect he doesn't really care. I've long thought he's more concerned about being a chapter in our great, great, great grandchildrens history textbooks, than making people like us happy. There is really only one event that can write that chapter. I suspect that a large UKIP vote will split the anti EU vote and deliver us all up to the Euro. Quite ironic really. I suspect that is what his Lordship will enjoy most.

4 comments:

Citizen Barnet said...

Some blue-sky thinking there, Roger. I envy you that ability. Here I am still grubbing around in the wretched Future Shape report, currently on page 32 and wishing I'd known earlier about the plain English version (Future Shape lite).

Don't Call Me Dave said...

Blimey Rog, I thought you'd stopped smoking that wacky backy?

Rog T said...

David,

I had till Mike Freer got in :^)

Anonymous said...

http://www.lgcplus.com/policy-and-politics/constitutional-reform/david-cameron-reinforces-lgc-campaign/5003577.article this is why, I suspect, the Future Shape project is being kicked until after the General Election.