Rog T's Cancer Blog - Friday the 13th - Part III - Redemption

First of all, thanks to everyone who expressed their concern and care after the two blogs I wrote yesterday (http://barneteye.blogspot.co.uk/2015/03/rog-ts-cancer-blog-friday-13th-day-of.html &  http://barneteye.blogspot.co.uk/2015/03/rog-ts-cancer-blog-part-ii-friday-13th.html ) about the latest stage in my journey and the frustrations I had yesterday. 

I thought I'd just post a little follow up, as it doesn't tell the whole story of my day. From what I wrote, you may reasonably expected me to fall into a bit of a blue period. I took an hour out of my schedule to take the call and digest it, then I had to work. Work is a great thing for the soul. It forces us to focus on things other than the problems in our life. When many people fall ill, they stop work and fall into periods of depression. I prefer the alternative. I prefer to throw myself into work.

If you work with someone who is suffering from cancer, don't automatically assume that they want less work and less stress. Some stress is good stress. If somene tells you they have cancer, I would say that the correct response is "Is this something you'd like to discuss and how can I help you get through this". In my case, the answer is that I have no sympoms at the moment so I don't really need any help, but if I get a bit tense around the time of tests etc, please bear with me. As far as I am concerned, for people in my situation, on active surviellance, the issues are purely psychological. All I ask is that if I am a bit short sometime, maybe make a slight allowance as I may have things on my mind. 

When we have setbacks and stress, it is not inevitable that we fall into depression, but we need help and support to cope. Now quite by chance, I had the best possible therapy for my feelings of  stress and frustration. I had a rehearsal booked with my band, The False Dots. We have recently been doing some recordings and it was a first opportunity to get into the studio and review the recordings. So myself, Allen, Fil and Graham arrived at the studio shortly after 5pm. We spent a couple of hours reviewing the recordings and Allen did some vocal overdubs. I was actually amazed at just how great some of the songs sound. I was particularly pleased with my own guitar playing on some of the tracks. I am not a great technical player, but I like to think I've got good feel for music. I was really pleased with the way the recordings came across. They are rough pre prod takes to allow us to refine the arrangements, however I loved the raw energy. They were recorded completely live and there is  a real energy in the recordings.

We spent the final hour playing through the 15 songs that make up our set. We have written two new  songs - "Saturday", a football anthem about our love for the experience of going to a match and "In a Silent Place" which is a song about catching up with a long lost love via Facebook - it is a song about finding yourself. Both are co-written by Allen and myself. I am really pleased with them. We have also reprised "The Fern House" which was the last song we worked on in 1985 before Allen quit the band. It sounds amazing. Interestingly I think we play it far better now than we did when we wrote it originally. For some rather intangible reason, we were on fire. We finished the set as we always do, with "Action Shock", which is a song I wrote in 1982. It was based on an interview I saw with a British Paratrooper in the Falklands on TV. He said "When I see my enemy on the battlefield, one of us will not survive. I can't afford to worry about his feelings" in repsonse to a rather stupid question that is lost in the sands of time.  It is an extremely powerful song and one which always gets a response. I think yesterday we played it better than we have ever played it. I don't think any band on the planet would wanted to have followed us after that rendition.

We left the studio absolutely buzzing. I have not felt higher (and I had no stimualtory help) ever. I adjourned to the Mill Hill Services Club with Graham and had a great chat and a few beers. I returned home and was still buzzing at 11.30pm. To try and wind down, I got my two dogs and went for a walk around Mill Hill Park. There is a spot where you can sit and watch the a panoramic view of West London. I just sat there and watched the world go by as the dogs romped around.

In the peace and calm, I assessed my day and my life. I am truly blessed in my life. I have challenges, I have problems, but I have friends, I have a family and I have love. Graham commented that the best thing about our current line up is that we all lift each other continually as we play. It was a day when I needed a lift and I got the most massive lift imaginable. I had expected to wake up this morning with a grim outlook. Instead, here I am positive and looking forward. Music is one of the most powerful tools we have in life. It can change pour mood and it can give us strength. At the top of this blog, I posted a link to "Born to be Blue" By Steve Miller. This is a beautiful track and is one of the tracks I listen to when I am feeling down and need inspiration. Times of down and hardship help us find ourselves, however "no man is an island".  We need the love and support of our friends to get through. If you have any crisis in your life, this will show you who your real friends are. If you have a friend who is having a crisis, now is your chance to shine. Don't be too busy for your friends. If you've not read my blogs from yesterday, then please do. You will see that, without even knowng it ( I didn't tell the band about my issues beyond saying I'd had a bad day) they have transformed how I am feeling about life. All they had to do was be there and get on with it.

So if you were worrying about me, please don't. I am in a good place. 

Archbishop Vincent Nicholls visits Mill Hill and my moment of personal enlightenment

Yesterday (saturday evening), Archbishop Vincent Nicholls, the Spiritual Leader of Roman Catholics in England and Wales, visited the Sacred Heart Parish in Mill Hill. The purpose of his visit was to say mass to celebrate the 350th anniversary of the death of St Vincent De Paul and St Loise de Marilliac, who founded the Vincentian priests who run Mill Hill parish and the Daughters of Charity, who are based on the Ridgeway. As one might expect, the church was packed, with the church hall also packed and a video link for those in the hall to watch mass. For the local RC community, this was an important highlight of the year. After the mass, everyone moved across the road to the Hartley Hall for a reception and buffet. The food and drink was provided by parishioners and was superb and the hall was absolutely packed. The Archbishop was on good form. The parish Priest Fr Kevin O'Shea reminded the Archbishop that he laid the foundation stone when the new church was built and his silver enscribed trowel is on display in by the entrance to the church. The Archbishop responded by saying he must remember to take it with him this time.

The Archbishop also presented a cheque for £25 to the godmother of Hanna Aynalem Abeyneh. Hanna is a twelve year old girl who lives in Ethiopia. She was visiting London in the summer and won a competition run by the parish to write a prayer for the 350th Anniversary of St Vincent. Here's the prayer she wrote :-

St Vincent De Paul and St Louise de Marillac: Through you I ask our heavenly Father to give hope to many people in London and throughout the world, who experience loneliness, hunger, homelessness and rejection. So that they may come to understand the power and love of God. Amen.

I think that most people, whatever their religious persuasion (or lack of it) would agree with her sentiments and agree she was a worthy winner. The archbishop commented on the way the parish has grown since his visit and how great it was to see so many people coming together from such a host of nations. My son commented to me afterwards that he really enjoyed the reception and that the cakes were really tasty. He said that if they had more such events they'd get even more people coming along. It was nice to see him and so many of his schoolmates enjoying the experience.

Anyway I said in the heading that I had a moment of personal enlightenment during mass. I kid you not. As I sat in the moments silent contemplation, where we were asked to contemplate our lives, my thoughts went back to earlier in the day. Regular readers of this blog will know that I went to see the Steve Miller Band on Thursday night at the Albert Hall. Steve Miller was on the Jools Holland Show on Friday night and he was interviewed by Jools. I missed the show on Friday, but watched it at work on Saturday afternoon (I'm the boss, I can do that !). Jools Holland was asking Steve Miller about his new album, which is an album of the Blues. He asked if he was influenced by great bluesmen such as Lighning Hopkins. Steve replied "Yeah, I used to play bass for Lightning Hopkins". Jools was suitable impressed and said "Wow that must have been great, what was he like". Steve Miller replied that it was awful. Jools looked really shocked and Miller explained how he was living in a camper van and Lightning was paying him $10 a night. It was just the two of them on stage. One evening, half way through a song, with hundreds of people in the audience, Lightning stopped and said "Now all you musicians stop playing I want to do this one on my own". As Miller was the only musician on stage he felt humiliated. Jools asked how he felt about it. Steve Miller replied that he'd felt really bad about it for about 15 years, until one day he realised that he'd been lucky to play with Lightning and that it was Lightnings show and it was just part of it.

Anyway, for some reason I thought back to this as I sat there. I've always wondered how bad things can happen and why God lets them. For some reason I thought about Steve Millers comments about how after 15 years he'd suddenly realised that he hadn't really seen the whole picture and how lucky he was to even have played with Lightning Hopkins. We live in a fantastic city in an amazing world. bad things happen but maybe sometimes we need to see the good things and not just the bad things. Sometimes we can only do this after a period of time has passed. I realised that many of the things which happened to me over the years that I felt bad about have actually strengthened and helped me.

Enlightenment comes in strange ways, at odd times and in odd places. Maybe we all need a few moments of quiet contemplation from time to time to see the bigger picture. Enjoy your Sunday - and if you want to check out Steve Miller on Jools, here's the link

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00v8rs8/Later..._with_Jools_Holland_Series_37_Episode_4/

and now for something completely different.

Do you remember the good old days? The days before Lynne Hillan took over the Leadership of Barnet Council and we didn't have to wage war every single day on library closures, sneaky allowance rises, excessive secrecy and highly paid consultants who deliver nothing? Well, it seems so long since I did a blog about the other things in life, I thought I'd just touch on a few little things which have made life worth living.

First off - did you see the Jools Holland show last night. He nicked my joke - http://barneteye.blogspot.com/2010/09/which-milliband.html -  anyway off to see the SMB tomorrow, and they look in top form. Their rendition of "The Joker" was superb. Next time you want to nick my jokes Jules, at least give me a ticket for the show.

Next up - today is a day of great personal achievement for me. 4 years ago a consultant advised me that I needed a back operation. He suggested that maybe some physio would help. I saw a superb physiotherapist - Julie Gear - who advised me, amongst other things to lose some weight and exercise more regularly. Since then I've been going to the gym every single day of the week (apart from Thursday when I play 5 - a - side at Powerleague). One of the targets I set myself was to row 2km in under 7.30 on a concept II rower. Today, four years later, I hit my target for the first time. I guess I need a new target now. I still have back pain sometimes, but I am nowhere near the state I was then.

Next up, a source of great pride to me is the Sound Skool music project at my business, Mill Hill Music Complex - check these photos of week three of the course -  it is great to see young people learning, developing and acquiring new skills whilst thoroughly enjoying themselves. The course is 10 weeks, it has five options music production, MC'ing, DJ'ing, Live instruments and vocal skills. The courses are free for young people aged 14-18 not in education, employment or training. They are funded by Youth Music and run by YMCA.

I'm off now to finish off some mixes for the new album by my band, The False Dots. Enjoy your evening and if you haven't already, please sign the library petition. It's not all gloom though

Killer Klowns from Outer Space (and other Barnet Tory theme tunes).

Great News - The Barnet Eye Blog is pleased to announce it's competition to find a theme tune for the Barnet Conservative Council elections.

 Here are the nominations.

Attack of the Killer Clowns - The Dickies


As Tears Go By - Marianne Faithfull


Born to Lose - Johnny Thunders and the Heartbreakers


Take the Money and Run - The Steve Miller Band


*********** Update at 17:45 **********************
I have been requested to add the following to avoid any confusion

DISCLAIMER
The Barnet Eye wishes to make it clear that this poll isn't sanctioned by the Barnet Conservative Party. There is no prize for the winner and no animals were hurt in the making of this blog. Any resemblance that these songs may have to members of the local Conservative party or their policies is purely (and unfortunately) coincidental.

Rock and Roll Records

I wanted to write a bit about my favourite Rock and Roll records, but I thought before you start reading it, I'd give you a wicked tune to listen to whilst you read.  It's saturday night so chill and enjoy  - I specifically selected a no vid clip so you'd not get too distracted.

JJ Cale - Rock and Roll Records



I love vinyl records. I love everything about them. The Smell, the shape, the covers, the engravings in the vinyl by the cutters. This little post is about some of the records I love, for reasons other than the ace music they contain.

This is my favourite album cover of all time. I used to just stare at it for ever. I like the perspective that makes the guitars look big. I love the way Steve Miller is leaning on Tim Davis shoulder, whilst Tim Davis is looking mean and sharp. I love the stormy sea and the shipwreck and the earth transposed as the sun. It sort of says to me "Things can be bad but music can get you through the bad times" The earth in the background has promise of unattainable beauty. It sums up the mystical majesty that music can weave in our imagination.

By the way, the music on the album is great as well, I love Dime a Dance Romance. One of the all time greatest forgotten classics.

Next up we have those little messages that the people who actually cut the records used to scratch into the vinyl between the last track and the label. Many punk records had the message "A Porky Prime Cut". Often there would be other little messages. For example "Music For Pleasure" by "The Damned" has "Tweeter Twister" etched onto side A and "Woofer Warper" on side B.

These little throwaway messages have always fascinated me. Rather like ancient graffiti on the inside of Pyramids and notes left in the attics of public buildings. This album is a strange one. Not acclaimed at the time, but I think the single "Don't Cry Wolf" was a classic.

Then there's coloured vinyl. My favourite use of this is Sound of the Suburbs by "The Members". There was a period when everything came out on coloured vinyl. I think this was the most imaginative use. This was actually on clear vinyl.

Next up. The 12" single. Usually associated with dance music, the first time I came across this was when my Sister Caroline bought "Sheena is a Punk Rocker" on numbered, limited edition, 12" vinyl. There is no more glorious record on the planet.

There are many things I could say about the Ramones. Best Live band, Best gig (Roundhouse, June 1977), coolest guitars. Best single title (Bonzo goes to Bitburg), best lyrics - Rockaway Beach, funniest song - Pinhead.

I owe them everything. If I'd not seen the Ramones, I'd not have got Punk Rock.

Then there's Electric Ladyland by Jimi Hendrix. When I was 14 years old, there was no such thing as a video, so there was no such thing as pornorgraphy in Mill Hill. Then I bought this record. I put it on and just stared at this picture for ever. Ever since, whenever I listen to crosstown traffic, I am just transported away to somewhere very nice that I really like to be. I was in a secondhand record store in New York a couple of years ago and a young rocker came in. He picked up the record, looked at this picture for about 1/2 a second and put it down again, without even noticing. I sometimes think we've been so bombarded with everything that we've lost appreciation of the finer things in life. I had a discussion with my Dad about this picture. He said he preffered to see women in revealing cloths and felt it was crass and vulgar. I told him I thought it was very beautiful. He just sniggered at me and said "I suppose I would have when I was your age" I think I still will when I'm his age. Have a great weekend.

A Sunday meditation on numbers

The last blog I posted was the 666th. I'm sorry, I'm a Roman Catholic of part Irish descent and I'm just too superstitious to leave that as the last blog for too long, especially when I titled it "Sympathy for the Devil" without realising it's numerical significance. To be completely honest, it rather freaked me out when I noticed, especially since I never normally even bother checking the number of the blogs.
Anyway in deference to this numeric milestone, I thought I'd do a little blog on the significance of numbers to me.

I am probably the most superstitious person you'll ever meet. I get this from my Father, who as a wartime bomber pilot.  He was shot down on his 40th mission. He flew for 40 squadron. The night before he was shot down, his rear Gunner had a dream that they would be given a mission to bomb the Ploesti oil fields in Romania. In the dream, they got shot down and the rear gunner perished. He begged my father to cry off if Ploesti was the chosen target, my father told him not to be so superstitious. It was the last mission on the tour of duty and he wanted to get home. The target was Ploesti, they got shot down and his Rear Gunner F/O Andrew Murphy died. He used to tell us a strange story about how, shortly before the Me109 attacked them and shot them down, one of his best friends, who had been shot down a week before, Jack Schieder, appeared in the seat next to him and said "It's a killer the way these Wimpey's go down". My father was just about to answer when Scheider disappeared and the 109 attacked.

My Dad said that as he was fighting  to get out of the plane before it crashed, he said "Lord, it says in the bible a man lives for three score and ten years". He said he had a great peace then and new he'd survive. As he was a pretty indestructible sort of guy, I never really thought about this, until he died of  a Heart attack unexpectedly in his 70th year. I suppose when you are 26 years old, 70 seems a long way off. I am reminded of Jack Benny. He once said that "everyone say's that no one wants to live till they are 100, but if you ask any of my 99 year old friends, that is a lie".

I have certain numbers I don't like. For some unfathamble reason, I'm none to keen on the number 7. I am rather partial to the number 6 (spelt SEX in Sweden where I lived for a while), but only because I have a childish sense of humour. I always felt that the number 5 was a bit of a fraud. I can remember that when I was a tiny toddler, I thought that when I  became 5 I'd be a "big boy". I got to 5 and felt I'd been robbed, I was still a little kid. I can remember buying the Steve Miller Band album "Number 5". I put it on and the first few songs are great, but it totally loses the plot on side 2.Having said that there is a great song there called "Industrial Military Complex Hex" which contains the rather insightful line. (The song was written in the wake of the police killings of students at the Kent State and Jackson State Universities in 1968).

Ain't too clear to pay my income taxes
'Specially when I know it goes to kill the masses
Love to hear the President make it perfectly clear
How the donkeys and the elephants are police up here

Not being a Yank, for years the line about the the Donkeys and the Elephants intrigued me. I assumed that Steve Miller had just smoked a bit too much POT when he wrote it and is sort of made sense at the Time. When I finally found out that the Donkeys and The Elephants refer to the Democrats and the Republicans, I felt a bit cheated. Having said all of that, when I play football, I always wanted to play Centre Half for Manchester City with the Number 5. Even playing for Old Hendonian's I usually had to play No 3. The Number 5 has always treated me rather like a Harlot treats a punter ! Interestingly enough, Peter Mandelson is an old boy of Hendon School, but he never turned out for the old boys football team when I played for them. I can't imagine what number he'd play. I rather suspect that he'd be a bit of a goal hanger, he doesn't really strike me as Centre Half material.

So what is my favourite number? Since you ask, it's the number 14. Now I never, ever wanted to have the no 14 shirt in football, as traditionally it's a Sub (the worst sub), but it's always been a lucky number for me. Coming back from Sweden, I once had my last ten Krona left. I put it on the number on the Roulette table on 14 and won. I saw the Ramones when I was 14 (see poster left). The first rehearsal of my band, The False Dots, was on the 14th February 1979. There are many things I did for the first time when I was 14, but as my kids read this blog, I'm not going to list them here (especially as my daughter is 14 and I don't really want her getting any ideas about getting lucky any time soon). I was 14 when all of my favourite Punk Bands hit the music scene, I was 14 the last time Manchester City had a trophy in the cabinet.

Anyway, I hope you've enjoyed "The Barnet Eye" blog no 667.