Sunday, 15 August 2010

Crikey - Them blogs of Barnet, they're all at it now !!!!!

Did you know that watermelon is known as natural viagra. If your loved one needs, shall we say, perking up, get them to tuck into a delicious slice of watermelon and they'll be "happy" all night long, as it were. Now this blog doesn't normally do sex tips, but after the last few weeks in Barnet, lets face it, we all need some light relief.

Regular readers will know that such tips are not the normal staple of this blog.  Mostly it's Barnet politics with a bit of Music and Football thrown in. I normally do a roundup of the various Barnet blogs at the weekend. Trouble is that apart from the Broaway Blog, they are all full of the same thing -  The news that Mark "Sharp" Shooter is taking on Barnet's Arseholy trinity of Coleman / Hillan / Harper. Even Mike Freer's "official blog" has got in on the advising his former colleagues to "do their homework and make the right decision". What on earth does this mean?

Another interesting development is the return of Statler and Waldorfs blog - -  I must also thank Vicki M for reminding me of exactly why I quit the Labour party last year - - Mrs Angry is cementing her reputation as the Picaso of Barnet Politics with another superb graphic on her latest blog - - One blog I've been meaning to mention is a rather bizarre offering from former Edgware Tory Councillor Richard F Weider - Mr Weider moved to Israel last year. He's clearly starting to lose faith in the Tories as he is very critical of David Cameron for criticising Israel. I think it would be fair to describe Mr Weider as a Zionist, so I was truly shocked by the contents of this blog. Mr Weider seems to imply that Israel is managing the flow of missiles to Hamas, which are then fired back at Israel. Is Mr Weider becoming a conspiracy theorist, accusing the Israeli state of manufacturing a pretext for  a state of permanent war? I left a comment asking him to clarify whether he'd simply drafted his blog rather clumsily, but he's declined to change it or even respond, so we have to assume that he meant what he said - -

Yet again this week, the "established press" - The Times and the Pres group are full of letters about the allowance rise. I await with interest how they react to "Sharp" Shooter's leadership bid. August is normally a quiet news month in a Borough such as Barnet. I believe the Arseholy Trinity deliberately changed the allowances at the July meeting as a cynical attempt to slip it through unnoticed. Sadly for them, they couldn't have got it more wrong. As Mrs Angry says, there will be blood spilled before this one is played out.

Oh and before I sign off for the weekend, I thought I'd just share the latest rumour from my friends in the Barnet Tory Bunker. The old guard (ie the Arseholy Trinity) are working on a contingency plan in case "Sharp" Shooter holes the Hillan Supertanker below the waterline. The strategy is this. A) Try and brazen it out with Hillan in charge and keep as much cash as they can (maybe a concessionary don't take it this year or donate it to charity). If the numbers don't add up, then they move to plan B. This is to get Hillan to bow out gracefully on some pretext (she doesn't know this yet). They then propose a "unity candidate" from the old guard. They buy off a couple of Shooters top supporters with cabinet roles (Hillan's departure will create one and there is another member who they don't trust and want to shaft). They will then propose a modified, stepped approach to the introduction of the allowances (or drop it completely if that won't wash, half a gherkin is better than no gherkins at all). Sadly the key part of all this is to keep as much cash as possible for the old guard. It seems that both of these options work pretty well for the chief whip, Brian Coleman.

I suspect that no one would be more surprised than Brian if he heard who tipped me off about all of this or why. It may well be Brian Coleman is getting a little paranoid about who is leaking what to who. Anyway Brian my advice to you is cut yourself a big slice of watermelon, pour yourself a nice glass of red wine, put on some nice music and look at yourself in the mirror. That way you can spend a pleasant evening with the only politican in Barnet who still respects you, rates your talents and that you can trust. These days not many things truly shock me, but today the contents of my email in box has. I can't decide whether they are trying to find out what I know and who's been tipping me off, or whether they genuinely have realised the games up. To be honest, I don't much care either.


Citizen Barnet said...

You're such a tease!

Anonymous said...

I think we all know it is Lynne herself briefing this nonsense to Roger! ;)