Sunday 31 January 2010

Bands I hate for the most irrational of reasons

As it's Sunday, I thought I'd share a few of my prejudices with you. Are there any bands that you can't stand, not because of their music, not because of their image, but just because something which really has nothing to do with them has offended you? Here's my top three irrational dislikes. We'll do this in reverse order, like all of the best awards shows.

3. Foreigner. Now if you've followed the blog, you'll know I like Punk rock, so it's probably no surprise that I'm not the number 1 fan of a band like Foreigner. But why do I have such a rabid dislike of them? Well it all goes back to 1984. I'd split up from a long term relationship with a girl called Lorna Davis (which happens to also be Dolly Partons real name, but no it wasn't Dolly). I was feeling a bit miserable and sorry for myself. I happened to bump into Ms Davis in Mill Hill Broadway and she didn't cheer me up. She told me she'd started going out with a chap called Dave Rotherie. I said "That's nice". She then told me that he'd taken her to see "Foreigner" the previous night. I greeted this with derision. "Why would he take you to see a crap band like Foreigner?" I was bemused. She replied "Because I like them. He asked me what I'd like to do and I said I'd like to go and see Foreigner". She then added, rather hurtfully "They were much better than all those crap bands you used to force me to watch". From that moment, I've loathed Foreigner with a vengance. How could I possibly have gone out with a girl who thought Foreigner were better than Richard Hell and the Voidoids, 999, The Vibrators, The UK subs and the Damned? She added "You know that in 2 years, you never once asked me who I'd like to go and watch". I triumphantly replied "Well as it seems you'd have forced me to watch Foreigner, it's probably just as well".

2. U2. Now if you think my dislike of Foreigner is irrational, this one is even better. On September 2nd 1978, the Boomtown Rats played at Middlesex Poly for the BBC as part of the Rock Goes to the Colleges series. The singer of the False Dots at the time, Peter Conway, loved the Boomtown Rats. He was of Irish descent and so felt a special affinity with the Rats. He'd seen them all over the place, spending his meager wages as a trainee butcher for Dewhursts on going to their gigs. As they were playing on our doorstep, we decided that it was imperative that we went to see them. We made our way to the Burroughs in Hendon and started trying to see how we could get hold of tickets. Sadly for us we were informed that the Students Union controlled allocation and they'd all been given to students. Pete Conway felt affronted. He was a "real fan". How could all of these "student tossers" get tickets, when he was deprived of one. My philosophy in life is "there is always a way". We decided to adjourn to a local cafe to consider our options. As we walked down, we spied the Boomtown Rats in a local restaurant, scoffing a large dinner and quaffing a few beers. Pete was bedecked in various Boomtown Rats regalia.I said "look, it's clear your a rats nut. If we nip and ask to be put on the guest list, he's bound to". This seemed like a great plan. In we trotted, up bound Pete to Bob Geldolf and said "Hi Bob, any chance of putting us on the guest list?". Geldolf replied "F*** off". Pete was rather taken aback by his heroes response. I was less easily deterred "The Vibrators always put us on the guest list" I chimed. Geldolf spat back "The Vibrators are a bunch of C**Ts. They are a rip off". As they were my favourite band, I was not prepared to stand for such a slight."Don't you call the Vibrators C**Ts, you C**t, at least they look after their fans, not like you, you T*****r". At this, the Italian waiter et all, ran over and informed us that if we didn't leave, they'd call the police. As we walked out, I shouted "I never wanted to see you lot anyway, your S**T". Pete Conway was devastated. Not only wasn't he going to get to see his heroes, they'd turned out to not exactly be what he was hoping for. He said dejectedly "I suppose we might as well go home". I said "Not at all, I swiped the passes that were on the roadies jackets as you went up to Geldolf". We walked back up to the Poly, bowled straight in and then hung around till the show started. Later on we sold the passes to a student for a fiver and told him he'd be able to go backstage and meet Geldolf with them (Hee Hee). Now you may ask what all of this has to do with U2. Well as a result of our meeting with the Rats, I formed a deep seated hatred of the Boomtown Rats. I thought they were arrogant and disrespectful to their fans, which was not part of the Punk Rock ethic. Anything which was associated with the Rats, I also developed an instant loathing of. When U2 came to promenance, I read that they were mates of Bob Geldolf in the NME and so instantly hated their music. Whilst I'm sure that they are lovely chaps, they always remind me of Bob Geldolf scoffing pasta and telling Pete Conway where to go. Is that irrational enough for you? the mere sight of them enrages me! The next one is even better.

1. REM. They are my No 1 irrational dislike. Now what terrible crime have REM committed, you may wonder? Well as you now know, I dislike the Boomtown Rats and all things associated with them with a passion. In what way are REM associated with the Boomtown Rats? Well do you remember an Irish band called "The Waterboys". I quite liked the Waterboys. I even bought their first album. I was playing it one day, when someone told me that Bob Geldolf was mates with them. That was it. I instantly went off them. They were tainted goods. What has all of this got to do with the REM. Well I was going to Somerset with some mates for a five a side football tournament and they put a cassette of the then unheard of REM on the car stereo. He didn't say who the band were, but I, for some reason thought it was the Waterboys. I chimed up "I hate this band". My mate said "Oh, I thought you'd really like them. It's your sort of stuff". Well that was it. It was only after a five minute rant about how much I hate the Waterboys, that he said "Rog, it isn't the Waterboys, it's a new American band called REM". Having spent five minutes ranting, I then replied "Well they're rubbish and I hate them". Ever since then, as  a point of honour, I've hated REM.

So there you go. It may amuse you to know that just getting the pictures for this blog unleashed a whole wave of loathing and diisgust. How could anyone possibly like these bands? Is there anyone with more irrational dislikes of bands than that. People say it's only music. Not in my house it isn't.

Have a nice weekend.

1 comment:

Don't Call Me Dave said...

Simply Red really get on my nerves, but I don’t consider my dislike of them to be irrational - Mick Hucknall is an arrogant ****!